「 found it on 9:16 PM 」

21Jan 2007

I AM BACK FROM BANGKOK!!!! WOO HOOOOOO!!!!!!

We touched down around 7:15, then bla bla..... I reached home about 8:30... lol


Be right back... I'm juz so excited... But i gotta clear my luggage first.....



-BRB

 

The End?

「 found it on 12:53 AM 」

18th Jan 2007 12:56am

There's all those excitment, and joy as the 5 of us(guys) goes to Bangkok for a BLM trip....

But..... I can hardly identify with their emotions...


I'm feeling a little panicky.. it's 1am.. I dun really give a shit about my luggage... Thank God i juz realized i have a little more than too keep myself away from hunger... But I've got another problem... My promise to my class to bring the 40sets of photocopied, Statistics Sample Exam paper is swaying between the thin line of total screw up & mission accomplish.

Why screw up? I realized that the papers weren't printed yet... And I and Wei Siang basically spent the whole day outside, CG etc, with the Statistics papers lying in his house....
So what does that spell??? "Fucked Up"

It's juz a simple choice I have to make here.... Make an effort, wake up early, and spend about $20 to fly a cab to tiong bahru, or remain silent, and choose to skip class, and become totally irresponsible....


So what should i choose?

Screw it man, I should choose the first one, and that's wad i'm gonna do... I'm planning to fail my exam this time, i wanna get all i can from all the classes.... And also, I'm gonna work on my classmate, I really hope that he will see more of god, and really cross the hurdle between pre-believeing and accepting god.

Fuck... Headaches coming....


I should stop watching CRANK... it's really making swear alot....

I juz said FUCK to 1 of my brothers early... I am really sorry for that....

Tiredness + stress + feeling a lil offended = a lilttle uncontroled...

I need to up my discipline level...

-Gonez

 

The End?

「 found it on 3:25 PM 」

3:31pm 17th Jan

Note: This post is m18. Do not read if you're not 18..

I am seriously.... BORED!.... As is siansation.... Like SHEESH u understand? Not like have too much time to spare... it's juz sianzation... Like u know SIANZ?!

I'm seriously not looking forward to the Bangkok trip anyways.... FUCKING HELL I HAVE $0 TO EAT THERE.

Fuck dood, I really wanna like sell away the tics man.. I'm going there dressed up like some rich punk, but i'm as poor as those crippled on the streets man..

Maybe i should go there and sell tissue paper?! Wad do you think?

Speaking of tissue paper, i juz radically gave $2 to a uncle at Tiong Bahru who lost 1 leg, and is now selling tissue paper... Kinda radical... I was late for class, and feeling a little fucked... But after giving $2 to him i feel alot better... LOL!! And i didn't get fucked by my OB teacher....

I think i'm gonna fall in love with OB... It's such a cool subject... I wonder wad kinda


-Gonez...

 

The End?

「 found it on 4:18 PM 」

Wake Up By Coheed and Cambria


For some weird reason, i fell in love with this song.... Sounds pretty tragic.. I'm feeling a little MEL!!!! Sob sob sob....... *sarcasm*

But you guys should really check out the lyrics of this song.... Coheed and Cambria - Wake Up, I'm really impressed with this song, as they usuall play progressive rock...

And nice video compilation by the way.... Real touching...



Oh yea.. and RvB Epsisode 88 is out....
GONNA GO WATCH IT NOW!!!!

Gonez...

 

The End?

「 found it on 3:14 PM 」

3:14pm 12Jan

WAD A BEAUTIFUL WEATHER TO SLEEP IN....

LOL....

But i can't... Hai... Still have stuff to do, and i'm going out in about an hour..... It's a sin to let the good rainy weather go to waste....... Hai...

I didn't go to skool today.... Woke up too late, made a egg breakfast that was too nice, then i left house too late ..... SO I missed the breaktime window that would allow me to sneak into class....

LOL....

So i went city hall to kinda chill out... Play a lil drum, then roam around.... Called Mindef... then tried calling SIM and MDIS... But i realized its lunch time, and no one's bothered to answer my call... LOL!!!!!

Lord I hope u grant me this deferement so i can serve in the TP ministry for a longer perioud of time... Let me be a full fledged CL or even a UL before i enter the DAMN place.... LOL.....

I am SOOOOOOOOOO BORED NOW!!!!! And YOUTUBE'S DOWN!!! ARGHHHHHH!!!!

YOUTUBE..... You AAFM..


zzzzz......


-Gonez...

 

The End?

「 found it on 1:20 AM 」

1:22am 11Jan 2007

This week has been a pretty tiring week for me....Or rather for many of the guys.... but especially for me and chit meng.. :p

I think i slept an average about 5 hrs for the pass 3days.... Ok.... Make it 4days.... It's 1:25am now... LOL

I was preparing a teaching till the wee hours yest night.... I felt the commitment to do on "Victory in 2007" Buti've neva done anything like that.... I was kinda confused.. I spent perhaps 2hrs playing in mind how the whole SD will be like... From the most responsive.. Till the worst that can happen.... But afta 2hrs... I realize all those random thoughts and scribbling were pretty useless....
I did a pretty neat script... In my mind I was really hoping to do alot better than the previous week..... But truth is, I am extremely nervous.. I had no idea wad to TEACH... becoz goals is more like a discussion subject......

Afta a miserable 4hrs sleep... I woke up... I was really thinking of not going to school.... I've neva felt this way for a long time.. But i woke up with a contracting head... I knew that i muz be pretty darn tired.... But I told myself "Others guys worked hard on their projs and commitment, and they're also dragging their bodies and giving their best in class... U should too.. besides.. it's only a few hours.."
I kinda whine abit... Then i got to bath.... Then left for school... For some reason, the weather felt really fine... I stood for the next 45mins, becoz both the bus and MRT is filled with people....
Thank god, i arrived in school within the 15mins buffer time.... And thank god that the book sellers are still around... it's the 1st text book i've bought after going through 3 different modules... I have to find a way to hunt for the next 2...

I prayed a lil... And God really went to work... The irritation in my head was gone for a moment.. I kept myself pretty awake for the first half... I even presented some nonsense becoz the guys in my group are a lil too gay to do it...
2nd half wasn't so good... The effects were starting to come back, and they brought along lathargy...

Afta skool, it rained... I met Mervyn coz he wanted to check some of my skool courses out.... Well thank God for him to follow me down to CMPB to clarify my worries about my NS...

Afta that basically.. I went home.. But the journey was amazingly agaonizing and long... The bus came like 15mins afta i waited... And a whole bunch of pasir ris and ping yi kids boarded the bus... By the time i arrive back.... 3:40....

I opened my lappy awhile.. Tried to gather my thoughts to do a lil more for the SD... i remb around 4:16 i couldn'at take it anymore... I decided to take a power nap... I was so dead beat... I set the alarm clock at 5, but i dun remb wad i did... I woke up at 5:15.. I was like SHIT!!!!! I got up... went to shower... And it kinda hurt your body when u try to wake yourself out of the dreamy sleepy state.... it's the twice it happened... During my bath, thank god... He gave me ideas of giving testimonies of other people... I thought of Rick warren... I eventually print out a scrambled messed up script... And left CG..

I was about 10 mins late, and Chit Meng couldn't make it.. I guess he broke already... He has been pushing himself till the limits for the past few days..

Afta some waiting etc, we started the CG..... I wanted to gather the guys... But some accident happend... I was strucked hard on my nose, i wouldn't elaborate wad happened... Then for the first time I can remember in my life.... I had a nose bleed.... I was clearly shocked... It was so severe that i saw a drop, land on the floor... I tot it was juz some scratch.. But it continue to bleed... I was in a mixture of fear, anger, and worry... But i didn't want the guys to worry about me... I did my very best to keep my cool.... But in me, i'm really paranoid... Wad if my nose if crooked? Or wad if it damages the function of my nose?! U might think i'm gay.. But right now, i'm still a lil worried.... Becoz i am suffering from a headache...

I cleaned up... I was a lil dizzy.. But i joined in the poison ball doging game anyway.... It was pretty fun... We had quite a crappy "teamwork" forfeit also... (Thanks ah lancaster.....) Rusty was punished also... (HUO GAI!) lol.... We did some stupid stuff.....

Then we had SD...... I really paniced... I'm dizzy.. And nobody functions well when they're dizzy.. especially when u're tryin to use your brain to teach... I looked at my script... But, as a matter fact, i was even reading it... I seem to be playing "God bless me in this SD, grant me the words" in my mind.... I folded the script and started.....

Pretty amazingly....... I felt pretty convicted..... I guess my brain is really malfunctioning...(I kept saying Warren Buffet, but I was tryin to talk about Rick Warren) But nevertheless i spoke with every ounce of enthusiasm i have.... I tried my best to tell them about my vision that TP guys will become the most exciting, the cream of the crop group in WHOLE OF TERTIARY... I used Ben's testi (bike) to speak to them about mainly Matthew 6:31-33 and Joshua 3.. I wanted to keep it interative.. I really hope they get wad i'm saying... During prayer.... I felt the holy spirit around me... And I prayed several times, and for the first time... I said something like"God wants to speak to you" kinda thing.... It has been quite a while since i felt the spirit moving in my body so powerfully....

Afta all that we had dinner.... at................. PRATA SHOP!!! YAY!! But I had lil appetite, maybe becoz i ate a lil before i came out... I felt like i overate afta i finished the puri. I left like 3 mouth worth of puri on the plate, and kinda breathe in breathe out... Afarid to get indigestion again.. .LOL

Overall... the day was pretty fantastic... I set many goals during the SD... I hope that me and my guys all will try their very best to follow through and make 2007, a really significant year....


-Gonez

 

The End?

「 found it on 11:06 PM 」

8th Jan 2007 11:07pm

Let me give u a brief introduction to TODAY for me first...... Its a day filled with lots of screw ups, but equally lots of miracles...

I started of day.. Actually i started it when i finished the previous post... Pretty F***ed up.. I woke up feeling pretty damn tired.... I made the excuse to wait for my mum to finish her bath, and took another 15mins to roll around my bed.... (Imagine having only 5 hours of sleep)
My mum came out.. i turn my head around and i saw the clock 7:42am....... 7:42AM?!?!?!?!?!?! I gotta reach tiong bahru at 9!!!! 7:42AM?!?! Haven't brush teeth, eat breakfast, pack bag...comb hair!!!!!! I jumped out, and went to bathe.... As i bathed... i felt sleepy, so i think i fell asleep while washing my hair..... came out 7:58!!! WTF?!?!?!

Lucky i asked my granny to make 2 half boiled eggs.... I was still tired.... so zzzz... waste time eating until 8:22.... (U understand that means u are surely late)
I left house... waited for like 10-15mins... then i realize.... Negative CREDIT in my EZ-Link!!! WTF!!!!! I walked all the way to the Kopitiam behind to try to find somebody to change coins with...
Miracle no.1: I jogged there, I pulled out my 2 dollar note and asked the coffee auntie whether i can exchange it with coins... Disappointingly, she said... "I dun have enough coins" WAH!!!! (Burn, lightning thunder.. bang) I kinda dropped my head abit... Then the indian guy who was PURCHASING his cup of coffee said... "Eh boy, change with me la" THANK GOD!!!!!!!! woooo

Miracle no.2: I left the coffeeshop, and walked quickly to the bus stop. It was 8:40+ already.. I prayed for a bus... And guess wad? I saw a 69 and a 67 coming together... THAT'S THE MIRACLE...
Traumatising situation: when the bus door open, a gush of hot air came out.. I tot it was juz the weather, coz it's hot outside..... I was wrong.... I realize... as soon as the bus door closed... The place was WARM and STUFFY, AND HUMID... My body begin to sweat... and i had to keep using tissue to clean myself up... Somehow, the traumatising bus ride dosen't seem to affect some of the passengers around me... I felt kinda dizzy, and it somehow reminds me of a show of how a bunch of illegal immigrants died due to the failure of the ventilation system... WAHA......

Miracle no.3: well not exactly.. But thank god i got out of the bus alive...

Miracle no.4 I prayed to God that I won't be too late.. and I arrived at Tiong Bahru at around 9:35.. I was YAY!!!!
But something screwed up happen.. I have problem exploring new places... So i got lost.. and roamed around till 9:40+ almost 50 before i found the place.... Then... I had to find the class....
I looked at the plasma screen "02/06DBA - E-commerce Lai Keng Yew" I was like "WOAH! THAT IDIOT TEACHING MY CLASS AGAIN!!! CONFIRM DIE!!"

Miracle no.5 I realize my class is 05/06 and my teacher was really friendly(A.K.A slack). She didn't mind me late... I saw the clock 10am.. PPL were whispering like "woah this guy come at 10" I'm pretty proud of that .. LOL

I basically spend the rest of my time juggling between listening to her, copy her notes, and sending messages to all my core team, and thinking of the CG. While the rest of the class was sleeping, talking, reading magazines etc. (my class IS OFF THE HOOK!)

Miracle no.6: I prayed to god to grant me strength to focus in class... And I didn't felt sleepy at all.... I remb the lecture, and i guess i was the most attentive... Quiet.. but attentive..

Miracle no.7: My teacher wants to print notes for the class... I got the opportunity to use WS business to print for the class... I think i'm gonna wanna monopolize it for my other 2 modules, and prolly make other lecturers use the service... MUHAHAHAHA

Lecture end, i left the room, still feeling quite energetic... For some weird reason, Ben keeps bugging me to buy my journal book.. I took the MRT down to City Hall... I too it with my classmate Adrian, he was the class Rep, and is the person who gave me the opp to print the stuff... He complimented me, and asked why I'm still taking a Diploma despite the fact i'm making big efforts to earn money, and also have a leadership role in church... I juz said, I dunno, the diploma is something for me to fall back on juz in case i fail.. Hahahaz.. It's also to no get MONO-entried in ARMY... i wanna go OCS or COMMANDO!!!!!!! *train*
I realized that he dun have a goal in life.. And he even asked me, "wad made me wanna commit to church?" It's quite a brow raiser... I think I'm gonna talk to him more... help him out..

As i went up the escalator, I decided that i wanna look pro, so i put on my cheap blazer... And it turns out. compliments my clothing pretty well... YAY!

I roamed around, and chose a very nice journal which cost a FREAKING $8.40...(from Azone) ok.. i am so gonna appreciate that book from now on...
Then I wanted to go to marina for lunch,was in the mood for some Wanton noodle.... BUT IT WAS FLOODED!!!!
And it didn't help when my gastric started screaming in discomfort and pain... I decided to move to city hall for a meal there... And prayed for seats there

Miracle 7: I prayed for a seat... But when I arrived there... the place was basically crowded with people... my jaw dropped...... I almost felt like clutching my stomach... but then slowly, the pain got less... Then i went around looking for a good store... My eyes were already closing... I decided to settle for some crazy korean cuisine... 5bucks... Coz everybody's queueing for it.. I also took some green stuff... (turns out to be liquid wasabi). As soon as I was handed the food.... a table not too far away clear up... Only 2ladies were sitting there.. I quickly went there and asked if it was avail.... YES!!! YAY!!! I prayed... and digged in....

Afta all that... I actually didn't wanna go back home.. Coz i know i'll most prolly be late for someone once i go back... So i went to the arcade.... I played drum mania... (since nobody was there)
Miracle 8: I PASSED THE ADV STAGE FOR 2 SONGS!!! YAY!! I didn't believe it... I got a 2nd credit.... IT HAPPENED AGAIN!! WAHA!!!!

But as soon as I finished my 2nd credit.. I felt so tired that the screen was kinda blurring... I tot i was gonna faint... I went down to grab a cab.. the STUPID cab driver tot i was going to Bedok Reservoir Road... went to the Ubi area, and practically showed me the whole stretch of BEDOK RESERVOIR road when i said VIEWWWWWWW..... Cost me 10bucks.... Basically thanks to that... i spent about $20 today...I muz repent.......

I got home.. My dad had trouble with Excel... So i decided to help him out.... I was dead beat... By the time i finished.... IT WAS 3:20! I was like... OH NO!!!!! I can't sleep now.. but i felt so dead beat.. i switched on the heater, I wanted to bathe.. i went to my room, kinda lied down abit... I was then awaken by XT sms 15mins afta... asking whether i was ready to go out... I told her.. I was going to bathe.... I tried to sit up... but i had a headache... I closed my eyes abit.... zzz WOKE UP AT 5:30!!! AGHHHHHHHHH......

I felt kinda disappointed, coz once again I was late for something, and as wad people like to say "wasted the other party's time" I felt bad... I bathed.. and left for DMM... I prayed i wouldn't be late for that too.. Thanks god i arrived at 6:58.pm. LOL....
The room..... was pretty stuffy... .And when nel showed us the clip for teaching... I couldn't really catch... though i was tryin my best... but still... ha... I think i zoned out at the beginning, luckily XT played back the part i missed copying, I shook my head.. and put in 101% of wadeva i have to focus on the vid... LOL.. and i tot it was really useful... I think I'm gonna borrow it from Nel... and watch is when i have a clearer mind... LOL



It wasn't easy completing this post too.... IT is SUPER LONG... I am brain dead now... zzzzz
Gonna go to bed






-Gonez

 

The End?

1:59am 8th Jan 2007

Total accumulated sleep debt for the 2 days = 5 hours...

Total sleeping time till school time : 5 hours

Current mood : not in the mood to sleep.

Hope: I hope CG will be fruitful... I hope i gain something from nel's dmm tml. I hope i dun die in class tml..

Worries: CG will fail. I will sleep in class. I will get a bad headache. Flu will get worst. Will get a foul mood. Sleep in nel's DMM...


Conclusion : F***ed Up


The end......

 

The End?

「 found it on 12:03 AM 」

05 Jan 2007


Errr.... Welcum 2007... OOPS....

Ya... 5 days late...

Ok wad did I do?

I remember i slept at 2:45am... And i deliberately set my alarm at 11am so as to make sure i only get 8hrs of sleep.... BUT!!!!! For some weird reason... I remember vadely that the alarm rang, and I shut it up, and switched it off(handphone) then i went back to sleep...

Then i guess about 1hr before i wake up, I have crazy ass dreams.. There's this 1 i was thinking of some thing that really looks like WHEEL OF FORTUNE... LOL.. Finally, Robin called... "Annoying" I thought to myself.. He even asked my granny to wake me up... Everybody noes, not even the DEVIL can wake me up when i choose to sleep.. But my granny can... LOL!!!!

I kinda stoned for a while... I think i was daydreaming... Groggy, then ben called....
"Hello...." Bla bla... Then my eyes open like 1 metre wide, jaw dropped when i realized.. 3pm!

I quickly wash up... and ate... I was like "SHIT MISSED BREAKFAST AGAIN! SURE TO GET SICK, AND LOSE WEIGHT!!! NONONO!!!!"

Afta a misserable lunch... I went to check on my SD, and I thought.. "Yea, it's gonna be sweet, I think my leaders are gonna be quite impressed."

Well, not quite wad I expect...

Lancaster is sick... I prayed for him.. And i also made the prayer that Ben who his replacement for SD will do well too...

We're suppose to split the guys up into 2 groups... But wad the heck.... When i arrived... ONLY 13 People were there... I expeccted ben to say, we combine as 1, and yea.. It really happen... I expect him to also say, eh I help u lead the first part.. And yea he said it too...

But this is the bad part... from the start, before i stepped into CG... IN MY HEART, or in my MIND, I thought, I better show them that I'm not late. And when ben say he wanna co-lead SD, I was like.. AWWWW SHIT!!!!! All the stuff I planned, If he's comes in, I'll be so confused!!!!!! My initial plannings!!! ALL TO WASTE!!!!

Now see here...... Here is pride at work.... U realize that I'm doing something to deliberately impress, or I dunno wad's the word, but to juz do it for the sake that ppl criticize u, so U better do it right for them to see... That is how evil my heart was...

During SD, mid-way when is my turn... I had a mixture of anger and confusion.... I cooled off a bit saying "let me see where I can start" Then i BLAed on...

As i continued teaching, I felt less and less motivated... I tot, NOBODY understands wad I'm saying, I'm messing myself up....

During Worship... I felt angry with myself... I was like... ARGHHHHHHHHHHHH...... I really wanted to push my pride down... But on the other hand, it's always like me to show my displeasure... I keep banging this in my head "CLOAK OF A SERVANT!!" Until i couldn't take it... I walked out... This time is not to clear my blocked nose but to walk out and juz pray... I kept praying "LESS PRIDE, MORE CONFIDENCE!" Then i prayed for all the guys to grow... And i prayed for Lancaster's illness to quickly shoo away..

Afta i felt slightly betta.... I went in... Bla bla end...

Afta the CG... I was already expecting Ben & XT to come to me and say, "eh u did alright" well ya, they said that... And i felt really skeptical about it... they both said "U have improved" but i thought, wad's the point of improvement when I can't capture the people's attention and knock the message into their brains like every service???
I juz kinda shook off their encouragment.. But Ben ever persistent... Pissed me off, but he did make sense... It's better to improve than not let anything happen at all...

Then i realize how childish I was... The fact is that, I always liked to be above others, I love improvments, and I use to have the habit of congratulating myself, and even to the extend of giving myself treats from a CAFE as a kinda encouragment...

But now, blinded by self made goals and expectations... I keep thinking, "There's no point for improvment if your improvment dosen't hit a target that's somehwat significant or tangible" And i keep thinking, I'm really lousy... But I remembered this.. God called Noah, when he's one of the shittiest candidate in terms of physical abilities to bring a swarm of isralites to safety.. But God chose him, coz he knew he would obey... GOD CALLS for the UNQUALIFIED...

I'm really gonna try to change that evil self pity side of me.... It seriously makes me look ugly and worthless...


Oh yea right.. TML there's jamming... it's 2:41am now, and I'm still having flu... I hope the Pi Pah Gao works well for me... So that i can sing tml... I really hope that tml's jam will be fruitful.. Like makes us grow closer to one another, and become a step closer in playing like Hillsongs... hahahaz.....

okok go sleep le..


-gonez

 

The End?

「 found it on 6:47 AM 」

1 Jan 2007 6:47am




2007!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOHOOOOOOOO..........

HAPPPPPPPYYYYYYYYY NEEEEEWWWWW YEAR!!!!











Waha... Tonight is fantastic... I juz arrived home.. i can hardly keep my eyelids up... They're like so heavy man...... LOL!!! Okok.. i promise to blog wad happen during the last night of 2006 till the wee morning of fresh new 2007..... ^_^ After I sleep....

-Gonez..

 

The End?