Warmth in the freezing cold.

2008-08-25T00:24:00.003+08:00

China olympics has just ended...

Though I neva really chased after the events and games... But something told me to not miss the closing ceremony..

And thank God for that something, the closing ceremony was fantastic...

I would describe the whole ceremony as both invigorating and alluring...

Alluring in a way that it makes you not jsut wanna catch it in your big screen TV.... But there's some kinda unseen force in your head telling you... YOU HAVE TO BE THERE!!!
But.. I'm not there.. so... zzzz

The performance is so damn choreographed... It's a feat to accomplish that kinda stuff.. The whole performance doesn't give me the feeling like it's.. SO LONG!! GOOD BYE!!!
It's kinda like... "Goodbye! But straighten up... anticipate and work towards the next big thing" kinda feel..

LOL..

I hope I'm not the one feeling like this... LOL

Kinda gay to be writing bout the olympics anyway...

I'm jus kinda random...

LONG LIVE BEIJING OLYMPICS!!

LOL

2008-08-19T18:50:00.003+08:00

When everything depends on luck...

Like there's someone out there flipping a coin to determind your outcome...

Coin faces right side up.. U win.. move on to stage 2... face down? I'm sorry..

Nothing's really in your control anyway...

Don't need to bother bout lookin forward to the right side up.. jus enables u to move to another stage, no free gifts or prizes for being lucky... besides.... Lookin back.... Stage 2 isn't so different from stage 1 afterall... Only constantly changing or growing variable is you...

I have to end this cycle..... Somehow...

2008-08-19T18:38:00.002+08:00

Most pessimist thinks about the present.. Don't plan bout the future, coz it's all dark and gloomy... Someday they'll trip fall and die anyway..

I don't think I am in that catergory... I am pretty optimistic bout my gloomy road ahead..

LOL...

2008-08-15T04:45:00.003+08:00

Working in places that's located at places where people all over the world come and go, you tend to notice certain interesting stuff..

As a Singaporean chinese, we're kinda like in a middle of nowhere... Natives from China struggle in an attempt to speak english (failed of course..) for my sake, thinkin that I can't understand chinese(maybe I'm too tanned?), while people from the western side try to speak every other mother tongue, chinese malay... (thank God no one tried tamil with me yet..)
What's with that? LOL... Don't they go research bout Singapore before dropping by? LoL...
(Heard the Olympic game's opening stated our country's first language as Malay.... Wad's with that???)

Dear tourist: We are trained to understand both english and both our respective mother tongue(depending on our skin color.)

Also... You ever been to the arrival part of the aiport in the morning???? If U did, your should seen the guard dogs, and their trainers from our famed K9 unit!!!!
For those that haven't seen them.. (which I'm sure is the most of you)..... Those dogs look nothing like the K-9 Unit logo... Not all dogs are like the big and scary Rotweilers or Greyhound you see on TV....

Actually, this is why it's so interesing... I haven't actually seen one that even bears it teeth, and growl at every step it takes...

Most of them are like enthusiastic Golden Retrivers or Beagle looking dogs..... You know wad sets this dog apart from us? Not jus cause they need to walk in 4s and we only need 2(that is something we can be proud of).. They actually enjoy every day of their work... Tails wagging, wide eyed kind.... They look so happy (that's usually the opposite for the person holding the leash)... I'm not even sure whether they're really dogs from K-9, or the police jus decided to borrow dogs from SPCA for a walk...

These dogs teach me a little something bout having joy in serving.. though their undeveloped yapping brain may not be able to differentiate between work and play... But.. On the contrary don't we, humans categorized and defined these 2 a little too clearly?

LOL...

2008-08-14T00:54:00.002+08:00

我的华语还退步得真快。

必需要在从心在学起。

耶和华是我的牧者，我必不致缺乏 = The lord is my shepherd i shall not be in want.. Truth is.. I can't read the whole sentence...

Zzz... God gave me this word today... thought i look for the chinese one... I can't even read the Title PSLAM in chinese!!!

LOL..

2008-08-11T20:13:00.003+08:00

Helplessness..

The greatest kinda trouble anyone can get into..

I don't wanna go there...

HELP!!

2008-08-10T15:20:00.003+08:00

2 Good things jus wrapped up pretty nicely..

Marks the end of my stressful week...

I've not been a very faith-filled guy for quite while... Depending on what I can do, putting myself on the scale against the elephant size problems... No wonder I keep flying off..
God, still as patient as he always been, showed me that prayer works wonders...
Chit Meng prayed for a comfort cab at a peak perod... No cabs in sight, except for a couple red ones that passed by before we decided to take a cab... I thought to myself "Gosh, no cab in sight! Yet he still insist on a blue cab.... LOL.... Then he decided to pray out loud... Was the emberassing kinda loud.. BUT BEHOLD! The blue can appeared... turned out from the junction.. there it was! Appearing straight after the AMEN! Though it may not be a death defying miracle.. BUT COME ON! What are the odds?! lol... Cool stuff..

Tomorro will mark the 2weeks of painfully reptitive and boring life of exchanging time for money, while sitting on ass...

Lord I need money for the LC... give me some KACHING.... I dun think at this rate I'm gonna be able to make enough for the whole trip.. but I am gonna trust YOU, and stick it through... help me out.........

-amen

2008-08-08T01:46:00.001+08:00

YO!!

Happy Birthday Su Quan...

This whole damn post is for you!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...........

19 this year, you're only gonna become more gay.... Enjoy...

2008-08-05T01:48:00.002+08:00

I neva liked being shoved into the wrong pigeon hole... As a matter fact.. I neva like being shoved to somewhere...

But I guess God always have his plans... I neva intended to join sound... But today's training made me look back a little... I think I am really enjoying wad I'm doing... Spirit of exellence??? Screw that... I always do my best... But to enjoy? Wad the hell?!

Either I am losing my mind, or I got a new revelation that I haven't quite grasp yet.

God...

Continue to mold me.... I wanna be used more by you... Cause... I feel I am being under-utilized.... Don't wanna become stale again...

Bless my guys also.. they're like water in a cistren!! Lord we want a breakthrough!! I really mean WE! Knock some silly sense into us... Buck up and do something...

2008-08-05T01:34:00.002+08:00

Am I starting to get a little cranky again???

Short-fuse... Short attention span... Sleepiness.. Zzz....

2008-08-04T14:20:00.003+08:00

And to think that I was spontaneous...

The Radicals have done it again!!! Crazy ass-ed people jus rammed a truck into a PATROL post in China tossing grenades, killing 16 police... (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26003627)

Once again... It's pointed out that these people are non other than those Muslim Radicals...

It's a really sensitive topic here, we're slamming one of the biggest religion in the world! But the reports mentioned that these radicals are Muslims from Xinjiang province...

WAD THE HELL?! It is a stupid thing to smash your own town! And besides... I don't think those Muslims in Xinjiang has affiliations with Al Qaeda or smth...

Prolly pre-matured fireworks to celebrate the Olympics??? DOOD! 16 people died!

LOL...

Won't give any smart advice... Think it's pretty lame, and they already know wad's the right thing to do.. Stupid to blow up your own house right? Think they need to get back to grade school...

2008-07-31T09:58:00.003+08:00

Be proud my fellow citizens!!!

Singapore has been cited by MSN for it's latest attraction... The Singapore FLYER..... http://travel.msn.com//Guides/MSNTravelSlideShow.aspx?cp-documentid=558452&imageindex=9

I always thought that we only won prizes for being the small and mighty island(still small), most creative tax methods, the red dot, and the greatest Ditto, but to see one of our structures featured as a marvel.. Wow... that's a first. Small island, big thing...

Right smack in the centre of the city, the Singapore Flyers shows you the City, and the HDB flat, and a ridiculously big golf course that has nobody inside... Still if u like looking from the top down... It's worth the money...

The better pictures among the whole pack of randomly snapped shots...

Oh yeah... invest in a better camera before taking the wheel...

But it won't be long before some place else opens another even bigger observation wheel. LOL...

2008-07-26T03:25:00.001+08:00

THANKS GUYS!!

Thanks for remembering my wants... You guys have really pampered me this birthday... whew...

Thanks for all the carnivorous meals.... I need to go on a veggie diet now...

^_^

Thanks alot alot alot..

19 Year and 1 day old officially..

2008-07-25T04:04:00.002+08:00

Nothing's more annoying than being shoved into a wrong pigeon hole for your birthday.. (And since we're really pampered Singaporeans, NO reason we shouldn't complain bout a lousy birthday?)

But it's also rather thick skin to wanna declare every single thing on your wishlist, wishing(actually commanding *subtle*) somebody fufil it..

SO! Since I'm not born in Africa or North Korea or.... (u get the drift), and my life requires more than jus bread, water and education(possibly sex too) to fufil.... I shall name my wishlist for this year on my birthday.. There's really no need to be a hypocrite bout my desires, say stuff like "No No! I jus want a simple meal." But you know wad's interesting bout naming your wishlist right on your birthday??

It's jus that nobody will be able to fufil the whole damn list, and since it's a week day, and it's 4am in the morning... I am really sure most ppl are asleep, once they're awake, reading my blog it should be already be the last few hours of 25th or it's already the 26th, 27th TOO LATE! No point and it's insincere to give a belated gift, so why not jus put it to next year? (but guess wad? things change, next year, whole new list) So, technically making it impossible for anybody to fufill this whole junk-list.(unless u're Bill Gates)

Here it is..

The really irrelvant useless, short-lived stuff

1. An expensive dinner, preferbly a place which serves Lamb.. (I'm a real carnivour...)

2. I need clothes, lotsa them.. Bermudas from Quiksilver or Zara should be fine for me..

3. My previous post indicates that my slippers snapped, I need new ones.. Really love those new Havianas( Is that how u spell them?) Or any random sports slippers or sandles.. Dun wanna slip & trip while I stroll pass babes at the pool...

4. I need a new wardrobe(clothes), jus buy me the whole damn Zara, and the male side of Espirit

5. I really like the Yamaha R6

6. Guitar effects paddles? Get me one of those Vox, Boss or Digitech multi-effects. (nth cheaper than 500)

7. Dumbells? And resistance band.. A small mini personal gym.. don't cost much.. maybe round $400

8. I need new books, a couple of books I found at MPH and Page One.. they're really good

9. I saw a couple of wine glass and tangs.. they look really cool

Ok... things get a little serious from here onwards..

10. Guitar lessons, possible, Vocals and Drum lessons too..

11. Language lessons..

12. Really expensive durable spectacles.. I'm going to Ns soon, and I dun wanna be short-sighted at war.. What if i shoot my commander? Mistook him for the enemy.. (the best one i had was sat on by a human ass whom I shall not name and broke, snap! TITANIUM!! 200 bloody bucks!!!)

13. I can continue my studies after I get out of NS... really screwed stuff up, I hope i have the money to continue now...

14. Money! I need MONEH MONEH (Can I be more specific? NO)

Now.... This is personal.. My own wish... I only have myself to punch if I dun fufil to them... (but I am not a violent man)

15. A business that's not losing money.. Making money as a matter fact

16. Instead of being a financial burden, I start providing for my family

17. Less of a whiner, much much more doing

sigh... After the whole load of crap I wrote.... it's all irrelevant.. Meaningless..

Take back everything i said..

Nothing beats knowing that there's something worth being celebrated for your end of your previous year, and the start of your next... Nothing beats knowing that looking back, you have something to be proud of, and looking forward, that you're gonna conquer another another point, that you're moving forward, higher!

Like I said... it's pointless to live like a king for one day, and know that the next day you're going back to same hell-hole u pop out from on the your birthday..

But of course.. celebration has to be done with a group... A group of people that rejoices for your existence.. That celebrates the day for you, KNOWING that there's something worth celebrating for this guy other than to sooth his ever-thirsty ego and selfish desires.. or to jus simply make his life a little more happier for that day..

Group of friends.. that appreciate you... doesn't need to be at that most expensive place... doesn't have to be a huge party.. (I'm not Bruce Wayne or anything)

Kinda like what I had today.... Cheers to being at Brewerkz every Saturday guys.. Thanks for taking me out today... Appreciated that...

^_^

2008-07-23T14:42:00.003+08:00

I am bored...

BORED!!! bOrEd! At work... And sleepy too... The jigglypuff tune lingers in my head..

I still have like another 2 hours to go?

WHY!?!?! WHY!!?!?!

2 more days to my birthday.. Depends on how u look at it... It's not really that special also..
But it's my birthday.. MY MY MY MY!!!!!!!!! BIRTHDAY.. OH Hell!! Of Course it's special.. IT IS SPECIAL........ (sorry high... too tired and bored) Meaninglessly special... that kinda special.. Happens every year, and it's gonna happen another 40 more years at least? (I seem really optimistic about life..)

A church works like a national statistics... And what I can conclude for this month is that.. MOTHERS.. U all are very fertile on July huh? Many many many birthdays...

OF COURSE HELPING PEOPLE IS EXPENSIVE!! U're spendin your most precious resource!! TIME!

Good stuff are always expensive.. sigh.... OF COURSE IT'S EXPENSIVE!!!
If good stuff are cheap, den how much would the lousy stuff cost? free?

2008-07-20T06:06:00.002+08:00

I tell you!!!

The new Batman instalation "The Dark Night" is whacked!... Excellent plot... It's the best movie I've watched in years... Probably the BEST in my whole life!!

The movie doesn't just play like a roll of film tryin to run from the start to the end, it actually engages you! Keeps you at the edge of you seat kinda stuff..

The plot doesn't focus so much on Bruce Wayne and Batman now... It's as if there are 2 lead roles in the show, The Joker and of course the Bat..

It's cool to see how Batman tries to get ahead of the Joker, while the Joker tries in every attempt not jus to simply kill him, but tries to push the Limits of Batman's morales and principles.. I think the plot is really well written, can't remb the last movie that made the villain seem as important as the lead anymore...

Shall not say more, else I'll be a spoiler...
Reccomend you guys to catch that show.. whether izzit 10 or 8 dollars (or for some cheapskates 7 at princess =P) U must go watch it!!!

2008-07-17T18:45:00.001+08:00

I wanna see the city!

2008-07-12T02:27:00.003+08:00

WHY!?!?!?!

WHY MUST YOU SNAP SLIPPERS?!?!

WHY!?!?!? SLIPPERS!! MY MOST EXPENSIVE SLIPPERS I HAVE EVER OWNED IN MY LIFE!!! WHY DID U SNAP?!?!?!?!

AND WHY DID U SNAP NOW?!?!?!?!?! I GOT NO MONEY TO BUY ANOTHER!!!!
YARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got no slippers now...

I'll needa wear shoes.... even when i go 85..

I'll look stupid!!!

zZzz...

Bad things jus keep stacking up this month... WHY!?!?! WHY THIS SACRED MONTH!?!?!?!

Happiness that only last for one day.. so abrupt, i'm used to the shithole i'm in.. and slip back down to misery the day afta... I dun want it...

Happiness has to be pursued... Happiness cannot be given by another damn human... U humans aren't perfect enough! I am not happy..

2008-07-11T02:43:00.000+08:00

Who knew that self-reward can be so short lived..

one moment you're savouring your little present for yourself...

The next moment you're back in the heat of battle, and u're back to square to one thanks to you little retreat for yourself..

Zzzz

2008-07-10T17:56:00.000+08:00

Neva neva use WIRELES INTERNET TO BLOG!!!

My whole blog psot is gone!!!!

2008-07-10T06:00:00.002+08:00

Can't remb how long this has been..

But as far as I can recall.. this is the 2nd consecutive day of my serious insomnia...

No shit...

I can't sleep..

I deliberately tire myself out.. waited till 3:30am(Yea i know.. it's a whacked time for u guys.. But i'm noctournal!) try to get some sleep..

15mins.. Couldn't sleep

Read the Bible...

Damn.. it's 4:15

Now let's try...

Nope it doesn't work.. coz it's 6:03am now...

Amazing how my brain likes to run at night..

I am having a migrane now.. I would like to sleep now.. God would u jus send me into a deep coma and wake me up in 5hours??

I am seriously screwed..

I NEED TO SLEEP!!! CAN I STOP THINKING BOUT THE STUFF I AM ALREADY FACING! CAN I STOP BROODING OVER IT!

CAN MY WORLD BE LIKE *ponies and butterflies, and flowers, and shit* FOR jus 5 HOURS!!

ARGH!!!!

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-07-06T04:50:00.005+08:00

I'm already the lowest low... How much deeper can I go?

Surprisingly... A lot..

Gifts that doesn't match the desires, and desires that spits at the character, character that doesn't take you through... Only works as a weight to bring u deeper into the abyss..

Not good to wallow in your current environment, not strong enough to venture elsewhere..

I just want to be left alone..

....

NO I'M NOT EMO!

There's no such thing as emo..

So I can outrightly say.... "SCREW YOU DAMN EMO'S!"

2008-07-02T15:06:00.002+08:00

Selling some really cool t-shirts from America! E-mail or message me for details! me for more details!!

Jus a couple of designs to show

PM me for a catalogue now!

2008-07-02T04:22:00.000+08:00

Correction..

Before you guys start raving and going nuts about my tournament..

I jus recieved news that.... I am in the reserved..

LOL.... I am not sure whether i'll be put in for the fight until next week..

But.. it's cool.. I'm not ready anyway.. LOL...

2008-07-01T02:27:00.002+08:00

Aww man..

Has been a while since I last updated my blog...

LOL...

But Life has been more or less the same... I got a job... The title is the cable car ticketing clerk... But I feel more like a security guard for Harbofront Centre..

I think i am going for a tournament in 2 weeks.. I dunno if i'm ready, I have been slacking!! but must thank God for the madam for noticing me... LOL... I didn't like deliberately impress her.. Hell I even went to her classes and fooled around, still unsure why she chose me, but prolly there's something about me that makes a good fighter, or a punch bag. (I think the latter sounds more true..)

July!!! Birthday's coming.. I'm 19 now... Very old now.. 2 more years before I get taxed, and officially liable for an official prison sentence for any felony commited... (not like i would commit any)

But more importantly, it means that my tank has jus been filled by another gallon of reponsibilities, so I have to step it up before the dam breaks and hell rages over me..

My shirt business.. OMG.... 6 orders so far nia.. JIA LAT!!

Selling T-shirts by American Oddica! really cool designs! Message me for details

Tired... Sleepy... Incoherent flow...

It's ok.. my blog anyway... if it's a eyesore to u.. TOO BAD...

-gone

2008-06-08T04:28:00.002+08:00

Gotta start my fitness regime already....

My life is still not tidy enough!!

Too many things I wanna achieve before NS....

ARGH!!!

2008-06-05T04:22:00.003+08:00

Man...

If u're born with good legs and hands... don't blame the world..

If your IQ is average... Don't blame the world..

The world don't owe you living, much less an explanation for your current state..

Nobody brought you to where you are right now.. You were walking down the plank and you didn't know..

"Don't turn around and start pointing fingers at us" don't blame the world..

Life's just gonna get even more complicated, the unsaid decision you made tells you that You're gonna be alone...

You don't like where you are, but you know you're here because somebody said it's better so.

You're not gonna like where you're gonna be... But you know you have to be there...

Responsibility over my comfort..

-Things I learnt today.. -

2008-06-02T14:35:00.001+08:00

i must be getting fitter....

Only got a sore throat after the whole CYL... hahaz...

2008-06-02T01:40:00.002+08:00

I am feeling really tired now... Can feel my ears burning up.... I must be over heated... BUT!!! I mus declare this.... GOD IS GOOD...

Recently I am placed in many situations where God is constantly testing my faithfulness, put me in environments that I dislike, or even pop my body temp up, jus hours before CYL2..

I remb wad Jeremiah mentioned before the CYL event that we should not have a complaining spirit regardless the circumstance we'll be in later in the day... I kept that in mind....

AND!!!

I wasn't short-changed.... I have always been praying for a place in BMTC School. Yet the information I recieved, even from fellow brothers whom are suppose to encourage me, but still can't deny the fact that chances are too damn slim...

BUT!!!!!

I GOT A POSITION AT BMTC School 2!! September!!!! (Pre- nafa) Hahahahahaz....

I am too damn happy now... Not only did i have a seat at the BMTC school! Also, i am given adequate time to complete my Diploma before NS... (ends at august 10)

Hahahz..

Gotta ready myself for NS... ^_^

ThANKS GOD!

2008-05-25T01:56:00.002+08:00

Miscanthropic, because the people aren't even close to being reliable

2008-05-15T04:56:00.002+08:00

HI!

I am lookin for JOY!

Do you know where I can find him???

..
.....
........
...........
..............
..................

2008-05-06T05:24:00.000+08:00

I really need a change of blogskin... Somebody!! HELP ME!!! COM IDIOT NEEDS A BLOG SKIN CHANGE!!!

2008-04-30T00:22:00.001+08:00

Stop my self-denial

Start denying myself

2008-04-28T01:37:00.002+08:00

As those who has stayed loyal to my blog long enough, U do realize that my blog entries are getting shorter, and rather.... Strange... Metaphoric... Emo?..... Or jus plainly lazy, diced up load of gibberish....

Decided to write something slightly longer... Why?

FOR my avid reading fans!!!!!

No.... U wish....

To celebrate the first book I've bought for myself for a LONG LONG LONG LONG TIME!!! How long has it been???? 1 year??? And within that year, the only reading materials I've read were like my Bible? Text Book? Teaching Notes? News paper? (is reading Messages in my phone and MSN messnger counted?)

Before I start talkin bout my book... I've gotta really say a little bout myself.. I've a rather strange habit of buying books when I'm seriously in need of cash... I'm usually found wasting and splurging all my money at expensive dining places, or something... That's when I'm less desperate/strapped for cash...
I'll always be investing in the right stuff when I find the Finance Strap contracting and gripping my head...

Hahahaz...

I know by the time u've read till this point.... U'll wish I would be in front of you and U could yell something like "BORROW BOOKS FROM THE LIBRARY U FOOL!!!"

Jus to clarify that.... I find joy and pain in buying stuff for myself... I find it both rewarding and dumb to purchase and own something of my own... But I always believed that unless that item(especially books) is bought by me(Stewart), I will find myself treating that item that I've borrowed with less importance.... especially books... borrowed from library or friends... Interesting at the first mins upon reading it... then the days that follows... It'll usually collect dust till it's time to return it...

OK! about my book.....

I'm sure all of you know about Starbucks(if u don't, u must have time traveled from the medival ages), how many of you are loyal customers to that brand?

It should be the most prospering cafe in Singapore? I'm not exactly their loyal customers as I've found my heart in a humbler cafe.. But Starbucks is still a brand that rather dear to me... I'm not sure whether it is the first cafe I've been in and ordered my first western coffee(not KOPI), but I remb crafting my first lofty ambitions, business ideas there. I was impressed by both the taste of the coffee and the quality of service that hence forth, it has been my benchmark for other cafes... (Coffeebean and Teafleaf is whacked, no offence to Coffe bean fans.. but... Seriously.. )
Being 14(I'm sure it's rather old... U must have went to starbucks when u were wad? 3? stopped drinking milk? decided to switch to brain pounding caffine?), and in a average family, I'm impressed by the natural casual service from the waiters in starbucks.. Unlike perhaps TCC, or Coffee Club.. Formality is and structure is much casual... I was surprised that U actually found cliques and friends chatting away hapily while serving their customers.. But still make simple yet tasty treats.. Always self-service, there's no need for the waiters to be standing at the corner to wait to clear your plate, or serve u drinks(Excuse me sir, your drink is here..?) LOL...

Wad makes starbucks such a success? How did it made it from being jus another cafe, to a global business? I've gotta find out... Even though my love is in another cafe... But everybody has to admit that Starbucks being a global business, still able to keep their quality in coffee rather high and competitive that they can pit themselves against other tastier easier-to-manage, small scale cafes.. I mean think about this... When things go big, or many, especially when it starts to sprout miles away from the motherland... Quality will SURELY drop... Service standards and stuff... will start to mess up... Unskilled business-wannabes like me will soon find myself not only messing up my branches and franchise, but also my original branch....

Ha...

I'm hoping to find more answers in the book The Starbucks Experience..

For all wannabes out there... If u're looking for a service line kinda enterprise... Seriously... look up to starbucks... hahahaz...

I'll blog more about this subject afta I've read the book...

-gone

2008-04-25T03:37:00.000+08:00

I need fuel!! Raw Materials!!!

I need MONEY!

2008-04-16T16:09:00.001+08:00

I am the professional LETDOWN....

Need a splash of cold water(metaphorically)? call me..

2008-04-16T14:52:00.002+08:00

A person can never juggle with 2 or more contasting persona's... One will be less prominent, but ultimately... the guy will look stupid..

The more I know, the more i realize how much I am not putting up what I know.... A man can't multi-task like that.

A wise man is suppose to know what he's saying... A wise man is careful with his words and actions.... I am not that yet...

LOL...

2008-04-13T05:05:00.000+08:00

I'm not a really patient person.. Doubt I like pets anyway...

But I have a pet cat downstairs my house...

WTH

2008-04-04T03:20:00.002+08:00

Your inability to comprehand my every move is not your fault.. But sadly... Its neither mine... ^_^

Stop seeking improvement... Start to be complacent and content with your level of ability to comprehand, will only leave u with the dust...

2008-04-03T01:48:00.004+08:00

I feel restless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Argh.... jus finished a tough paper... actually 2!!! I need to find a way to release!! I need to relax... My heart rate still feels abnormally high... RESTLESS.... tired but yet tensed... stress...

Zzzzz....

No offense to those who accompanied me today.. But I still dun feel totally chilled.... Or.. accomplished.....

Hmmm..

Not satisfied.... Thats a better way to describe it...

zzzz

2008-04-02T03:15:00.000+08:00

Had an episode with a freakish cat... or kitten..

Lol guess it realized that I am alot more freaky than it is....

Damn.... Our relationship ends tonight!!! It only started today!!

Talk about it more tomorro... gotta sleep for HR paper tomorro

zzzz

2008-03-18T00:14:00.002+08:00

Life goes on...

It doesn't matter how we spend our everyday... we're losing time, our precious resource...

2008-03-09T04:54:00.003+08:00

Don't screw with me...

Time is not medication, time is not the answer...

Time is a blessing from God, that we can use to exchange for something else...

Time doesn't change anything....

It's what we do... What we do changes thing...

2008-03-07T21:13:00.002+08:00

I am....

both rowdy and reserved,

Ambitious, yet lazy

Wild and free, yet restricted and confined

Classy and barbaric

Real yet faking.

Wad am I...

2008-03-02T16:40:00.003+08:00

Melancholic*

I am not very sure, if I should sympathise, or envy people who goes through struggles right now..

Others struggle to survive, and to make their bodies work above 100%... I am still tryin to push myself to be working slightly above 30% i guess... LOL....

My circumstance has always been really comfortable....

What makes me different from others???

Sometimes I feel I can do so much... But yet I jus choose to be like a lazy cat, jus sweep the mice bumps into it...

LOL... While other people struggle to fight their environment, I am fighting hard against myself...

I can do alot more!!!

Did I have this conversation before?? hahahaz...

I'm getting a lil too comfortable again....

I am discontented by my complacent body..

2008-02-27T02:24:00.000+08:00

Why u always kick me when i'm high???

Wad right do u have?

2008-02-21T20:52:00.002+08:00

OMG... didn't know Shawn Michaels would be doing this..

http://youtube.com/watch?v=5qum8zUWTMQ

Now who says wrestling is bad?!?!?!

HA!!!

2008-02-21T19:39:00.007+08:00

Alright.. Today's the 15th day of Lunar RAT New Year.... LOL...

And it's a rather mandatory tradition for my family to be gathered for dinner...

(I have no complaints bout' that...........)

And it's great! to be dining with my family(since most of the time i'm out), we talked abit, but my sister was the one who was saying a whole lot of... gibberish? I dun understand the words that are coming out of her mouth.... Though it's english, or rather, singlish..... It's jus random words being thrown out..... I'm actually pretty surprised and impressed that my mum understood.(or was she just faking?)

LOL.... But it's good... It's not good to have to have a ultra quiet dinner also, eles we'll be like ZEN style, Japanese! samurai... etc....

OK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After a whole lot of crappy introduction... here's the show stopper... Apart from the fellowship and stuff, who can resist my mum's occasional kamikaze spread!

And every year without fail, my mum's boss would give us a cup(metal cup, so it's big) or realy sharks' fin... I didn't take the frozen can, but I did take a picture of my mum's master piece... SHARK's FIN SOUP...

Here...

Can u see??? Dun mind the newspaper background... it's much cost saving... REUSE!! Save the environment and your pocket....

Just in case u can't differentiate the shark's fin from the soup..

HERE!!!!!!!!!!

Muahahaahahaz... Shark's fin for the win!!!

And... for snack...

KONG BA PAU... (It looks abit like the food u give to buddah right??? A little misleading... hmmmmm)

Oh wait.. WHERE'S THE MEAT?!?!?!?!?!?!

HERE!!!!!!!

LOL.... But too bad... Right before my blog entry started... the food has been whooped up.... Guess where is it now???

-Gone.

2008-02-18T19:19:00.003+08:00

I passed my exams!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOO....

hahahhaz... Thank God!!! THANK YOU GOD!!

U have given me a reward before I even lifted my hand. I will read your word daily, at least 1 chapter each in the Old and New Testament!! No matter how tired I am...

-Gone

2008-02-14T01:28:00.002+08:00

My calling from God???

Hmmm....... Wad does God want me do???? I dunno... I may be doing everything that seems biblical, basic stuff... But wad does God really want me do??

Was so sure about it months ago... But it's jus being a lil too excited and gullible.... Stop... I'm still tryin to hear from God... I dun know.. LOL....

Where's good for me to go.... I just know about doing wad's right, wad would glorify God, don't do anything that annoys Him kinda stuff.... I mean.. basic...

Dun get me wrong.. I do have a vision... but... It's just no link between that vision, and my current situation.... Like tryin to take a train to reach the moon... Kinda feeling.. I know I need to be at the moon.. How can i catch a plane or a rocket?

LOL...

-Gone

2008-02-14T01:19:00.002+08:00

!!!! Valentine's DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL....
Bachelor year again ah!!! sian...... LOL...

ahahahz, jus kidding la...

Tomorro's gonna be pretty happening i guess, steamboat with a bunch of guys.. (erm.. kinda wrong heh?) Good food, nice way to spend valentine's day fellowshipping our hearts out..

Hopefully 1 of the contact will come la... I need to jia you... procrestinate alot liao... I am losing to the darker side of my life... AH!!! I need to get a grip..

Actually buey ta han la... I dunno wad magical effects does Feb 14 has, but friends are all getting hooked up.. sometimes will be a bit pai seh also...
Not that I want to show off, but... dunno..... Animal attraction... Feb 14, I re-evaluate myself, and I realize, I am seeking for a BGR, not a BBR, that's good... Systems are functioning.. LOL...

Wonder if Gays celebrate Valentines... If they do... where do they go??? LOL... I hope I can see a gay couple tomorro... LOL..

Blessed valentine's day and a happy new year..

2008-01-31T00:25:00.001+08:00

Was reading the parable of the talents....

It's the "God know's" time i am reading it again.... Never fails to crack me up a little....

I always thought, "Gosh.... I'll do anything with that 1 talent the guy gives me.... How come he go bury it?"

But today, there's new revalation to this word...

Felt as if God is askin me... Wad are u doing with the talents I gave u? Kinda like a reminder for my procrestination issue...

I have been too comfortable with my own skills, and stuff, almost thought that I nurtured it, reared, grown, and owned it.... Well...

WRONG....

fact is.. I may be doing worse than the servant, instead of burying it, I may be splurging it on something that doesn't glorify God.. hahhaz...

I wanna grow myself... Multiply my own talents..

Gonna pray really hard for it... I want a daily breakthrough... Not once in a blue moon, not once in a month... but daily..

*Pray*

2008-01-31T00:10:00.000+08:00

We are all God's potential...

Thanks Ezri for that....

2008-01-28T11:06:00.000+08:00

Last night, or rather these few days, I've been a little too self-centred i guess.... Taking a step back.... reviewing my thoughts....

Gosh....

Childish.... Muahahahaz...

I've been to caught up with how I feel..... my own "sufferings".... LOL.. Etc. Seems as if the world's revolving around me for a while...

hahaz...

Welp... Kinda glad that the epiphany came to me soon enough, hope I haven't got on anybody's nerves... LOL...

As a matter fact... I've been too caught up with these emotions that I forgotten the essentials...

What am I doing big today???? OMG!!!

Need to foucs *hum.................*

-Gone...

2008-01-28T00:05:00.000+08:00

Man.... I should be recounting the experiences with the german... But recent incidents shagged me out a little... I think, if I'm recounting right now.... The experience will be underated, and stupid...

Meaningless!!!!

Man.... I need a break... LoL...

Meaningless Meaningless, everything is meaningless...

Burn out.... Fried, cooked....

I'm not sure if i'm more of a thinker or feeler now... ha....

I'm a vizard... :p

2008-01-18T20:09:00.000+08:00

Wad's this feeling??

Ha..

Dislike? Distaste?

I don't feel very comfortable with it....

Don't think is right for me to have that against...

*pray*

2008-01-14T03:25:00.000+08:00

Dun mind me, but i did some blog surfing... ha... thought it was pretty funny that people jus leave hate notes, and just kinda do nth about it in their real life..

LOL, just a funny observation, and I bet many others who read these post, and realize that "hey it's me!" don't just go straight down to resolve the issue, they jus post another hate post of their own...

LOL...

-Gone

2008-01-13T06:11:00.000+08:00

Regarding music....

It has always been like my passion... And I believe eventually it would blossom into a well-accomplish-Godly-vision as well..

But... I know.... At this current state... This station I am standing.....

I am not ready to fufil that vision..

"Before you learn music, learn the spirit first" Quoted from Ben.... I'm starting to get a clearer picture of what he meant.. Though he's no scholar or Shakespeare.. This quote has surprisingly deep meaning... And took me quite a well to understand it...

To my band.. Come on now... Consistent jamming isn't gonna take us to where we wanna be.. Besides... Where do we wanna be? Where do we individually wanna be? haz...

How are we doing spiritually? Are we neglecting our postition in the church, retarding in our growth, or even declining?

Come on now...

How are we gonna glorify God like that?

Fact is, if we're serious about doing music for God... If it's a vision.. It will get stuck onto u... and U will be carrying it wherever you go....
The instrument u're in charge of, your position, how much effort are u putting in to improve?

Come on now.. Stop and think...

Where do we stand? are we nearer to screwed, or success?

ha....

I can't always be the Yingwie Malsteem... (fact is.. I cant shred and etc.)
U guys need to take charge of this dream too...

LOL....

Grow man............

Our spirit!!!

2008-01-13T06:01:00.000+08:00

Without vision, man will perish...

And a group with people that runs in different direction will tear itself apart..

I am addressing my guys, Engit 1.

We hardly have a common vision, but now it's a whole new year... 2008... What have you done that matters?

We dun often see each other on the same page... But don't you know that this is tearing us apart? And what's more, we're blind horses, tryin to run in different direction....

We wanna grow, don't we? That's why we're in this church, or rather this dominion, that emphasizes on moving.

When u're not growing.. Don't you find it a problem already? When u're not a salt a light, don't you think this relationship is getting a lil off course?

Are you contented about your relationship? then why do you complain?! Besides, how can we ever, ever, ever, grow enough, and learned enough about God?

Is this where u wanna see yourself at the end? Is this what you call, I have fought the good fight?!

Come on now... Guys... wake up!! We're not young anymore.... We need to grow, and equip ourselves for every new battle and challenges that's about to come!!!

2008, we wanna grow, Engit 1 will not be a stoner..

-Gonez

2008-01-08T01:49:00.000+08:00

I am feeling................... Wait... I don't really know how I am feeling...... It's mixed up...

I feel upset at first... but now I feel fired up... Why????

I tot about it..... Guys... We need vision......

We need Engit 1's vision.. No matter where we are now, or where we're gonna be.... We need to capture this vision... And we're gonna take it to our next life station.....

Moving on to another station with the same sense of confusion and stupidity? Or driven to push and propel another group, or yourself? It's up to you to decide..

It's a unthinkable sin to waste away God's vision....

-Gone

2008-01-02T03:26:00.001+08:00

The countdown ended barely a day ago..... I have to say.. I am very exhausted, and relieved that it is over... ha...

I had like a lil nap earlier, so after some snacking.. I feel pretty awake... I know I am tired.. but I am awake....... yea........ LOL....

Most of our planning didn't happen, or go as planned, but as what Jeremy said "At the end, God was running the event, not us" I totally agree with that...

It was just seriously scary, to see things falling apart, then subsequently falling back into place.... Not the place we pre-planned, but at least, at a suitable area.... I was scared stiff at first, and even met up with a mishap of my own... But afta all that... I am seriously happy......

I learnt alot from this chance to plan, I now know alot more other areas to improve in, such as delegation, and pressing for clear response...

More or less, everything kinda fell into place..... The countdown had it's climax, and the performance from the guys still went on as usual... Overall I was very impressed with everybody that helped my part out.... The MCs, and especially Zhi Yang, he's like my counterpart, and has been seriously faithful to meet me up in time or earlier to get things, plan things, and do things..

*Wanna encourage you bro, U did seriously well... I am seriously impressed!!! Damn, if my first was as good as this, hahahz, I would have been a lot better now.... hahaz... *

Yeap.... afta all that.... I'm just sluggish, and rotting, almost dying... Thank God for Joel and the DI people, they came at the nick of time, and saved the transportation of the drum sets!!!!

hahahaz...

Okok... sleepy liao...

-Gone

2008-01-02T03:25:00.000+08:00

Welp....

Welcome 2008...
Wad have you achieved Last year?
Wad are u gonna do This year?

2007-12-28T04:58:00.000+08:00

I have a confession to make here....

I just got hooked up.....

I mean... seriously....

...

......

..........

.............

................

Wanna meet her????

...
......
..........
.............
................

...................

......................

Oh no...

Look at her... Sleeping like a baby.....

Hold on... while I strip her... LOL....

Meet Miss. Epiphone SG Special.

^_^

Here's the closeup..

Welcome her... To my family..... hahahhaz....

2007-12-28T04:48:00.001+08:00

I neeeeeeeeeeeeddddddddd to fight my stupid procrestination problem!!!

God Help me!!!!

Zzzz...

2007-12-28T04:37:00.000+08:00

This probably has no link with my personal life...

But I feel sad for wad has happened...

I don't really follow the news, but I am always impressed by a certain female opposition leader, her name's Bhutto.

Don't really know wad she's doing, but I know a few of her plans and promises made to the people, and is a whole bunch of seriously, whacked, but positively whacked ideas to Pakistan.

Was kinda expecting like the first female president to appear in that region... Ha....

But who knows? It seems as if that the world organizations, or particularly just Pakistan alone, has some kinda control over people who wishes to dramatically change the environment...
Some idiot, went to shoot her, and blow himself up...

IDIOT...

I mean, it's not like Singapore, or little old me is gonna be affected... But I kinda respected her, she was Matyred... Don't think she's christian, or anywhere close that... but, it kinda reminded me of Jesus a little... He was kinda Matyred too?

Brings me to this question.. At the face of danger, and when the world's against U.. Would u still stick through with wad is true and best for others? Or would u just sneak, and run away..
Jesus or Judas?

I mean.. start to think for others now... I mean seriously... Are u giving your life to help others? Or are still panicking, looking over your shoulder, afraid somebody would steal some of your gold?

I don't think that this world can allow too many good people to live... But I dun think it's a good enough excuse for us to go with the flow with SIN.... God is gonna come one day to judge us....

Wad are U gonna say? Wad are you gonna do that makes a difference?

-GONE

2007-12-24T13:34:00.001+08:00

Wad am I looking forward lata?

I dunno...

LOL.... I got a whole bunch of unwritten cards.... Damn....

Christmas is coming.. joyous moment... But i dunno wad to expect man.... No plans! No Fireworks! No happy friends, drinking, and merrying!

Wait..... or so I thought?

Merry Christmas everybody...

LOL

Season's here.... Enjoy yourself... It's a Celebration...

-Gone

2007-12-23T18:19:00.000+08:00

I haven't been blogging for a mighty long time...

Ha.. I remb when the blog craze was at his peak, I wrote entries almost everyday! Sometimes even 3 entries in a day! hahaz..

hahaaz... Now this shows, that I am not a writing kinda person..

But anyway!

I was just thinking about what Su Quan mentioned earlier.... He was jus thinking about his ups and downs of this year... And guess wad? 2008 is barely 10 days away.

He jus kinda told me there were more downs than ups for that year... And truth is, I guess, my year wasn't as different as his also!
But was quick of me to think of something positive... I just blurt out... "If u can count all the bads, and u're still alive, than prolly most of it u have resolved... So shouldn't that be a good?" "learning points ya?"

I was actually kinda surprised that I would say stuff like that...

Fact is that, this 2 months.... Has really been a rough one.... I did alot of bad stuff, and I realize I changed quite a bit also... Lost abit of connections with God for a while... But eventually got it fixed up before Christmas...

I wonder if my relationship with God has grown stronger this year? I expect my 2 years of being christian is really 2 years, not 2 sets of 1 year.... I really prayed about it...

Den God just gave me some really whacked vision... But... I am still working on it I guess....

I am not sure how does my external shows, but inside me sure feels different... In fact, I am rather concerned... I hate this weakness I have here... Not sercure with myself, and God, always depending on other people and leaders feedback to pave my road with God.... Irritates me alot.... But thank God, I got over it.... I know all the basic stuff, like, u're not running after/for man, but for God... Etc. Etc.
But it was just knowledge... didn't know how to apply it, where, why? should I? no..........
Then all of a sudden, God just answered the prayer... Tada... I realized that, being over-sensitive about wad other people thinks of U is seriously O*@&$(# me up... So I jus kinda chill...

Cool..

Yeap...

-gone

2007-11-26T02:23:00.000+08:00

Lord...

I know i have certain better traits, let it all be used to glorify u,

U being my cornerstone...

We cool?

Alright............

-Gone

2007-11-25T18:02:00.000+08:00

i know i am not the dynamic, or wondefully eloquent kinda person... But, I am kinda like half-way there right???

LOL... It's kinda annoying to suffer from mind blanks over and over again during certain conversations..

Ha...

HOW?!?!

I dunno...

-Gone

2007-11-17T03:58:00.000+08:00

Damn man, i haven't been blogging for a while..

Welp, before i turn in, i wanna give thanks to certain events that happen to my life this week..

As some of you may know, this 2 weeks ain't a very smooth week for me.. .It's just packed with stuff... I mean, seriously.. ALOT ALOT of STUFF..

My project presentation(and I tot it was handup also) happened jus last thursday, and the ironic thing is that, I accepted to do teaching that Wednesday, jamming on friday, Tuesday had to work and tutor/teach a kid how to communicate in chinese. So... As u can see... it's packed....

I wanna thank God that although i am a really half-past six chinese, and a even worse teacher, I manage to evoke his interest in learning chinese songs, and even managed to convince him to watch chinese news... That's kinda cool..

And U know I like to procrestinate alot, so the project, i just kinda do like a sentence everyday? Till Tuesday, I begin to pick up some pace, and Wednesday, I only went to sleep at like wad? 4:30? woke up at 5, to read the things, tried to something, got too tired, went back to sleep, woke up at 7, and jus rush it till 8:30. Thank God i was just late for 15mins. Pretty cool.

Also Thank God for anointing me during teaching, as He already noe, my brain was kinda puctured after some lack of sleep throughout the week, I still manage to lead rather decently, although I thought it was really far-fetched from the standard I was expecting, the impact and stuff.. But thank God, overall it kinda made sense.... WHEW.....

Thank God for the presentation, like when everybody else were in groups and had powerpoint as their presentation, I only had Microsoft Word, and managed to score a 9/10 (although the fact that nobody failed, and the lowest was 6.5) but it's kinda cool.. 9 is like the highest in class... Is credit to God man.... And amazingly, I can still work quite well, and tutor quite well afta the whole chionging the whole night thing...

But naturally, I came home and I just died instantly, it's like as if the holy spirit left me... I turned on the laptop, lie on my bed.... I jus died, in seconds..... W/o bathing or anything(ok, it's kinda unhygenic i know...) I didn't even switch on the air con, all i remb, the next morning, or rather, afternoon, i was in a blanket... It was already 2pm, then i fell back asleep, and officially woke up at 3. LOL

Ok here comes the icing of the cake, the ice cream of a banana split, the juice from the apple(?!)
JAMMING RAWKS!! IT RAWKS!!!

It's like the best jamming i ever had... Seriously... We manage to play "How Can I keep From Singing - Chris T." rather well in 1 jam! And our own EP! ROCKS YOUR BOXERS!

I mean seriously, to professionals, nothing cool... But to us, is jus big, big big big big achievement... Or probably to me... I was jus crying out in joy inside... man!!! Its the first time i asked the song to be change to a few keys higher, that means that the defult chords from the webbies we had should be invalid, and had to be adjusted.

I mean, it's just cool.... Thank God for u guys man!!! Look at how far we've come!!!!!

hahahaz....

Cheers to God, Big acheivement this week... I am expecting more more more next week, and week afta next, so on so forth....

Praying Fervantly man!!

-Cheers ^_^

2007-11-11T04:02:00.000+08:00

Ha, can't say the day started out perfectly..

Wait, can't even say it's good...

I went to bed at around 5am, with worries flooding my mind... Thank God that i could sleep till 2pm...

Thank God for my fantastic mum, that made wonderful spegetthi(Is this how u spell it? who cares?)

But still, my woes aren't gone yet... I played the PSP a lil, had like a total losing streak for a few rounds, den subsequently won everything back... I wondered if the PSP took pity on me? LOL..

I prepared everything, ready to step out my house at around 4:20, only to realize that somebody stole my favorite pair of shoe... I was so mad!!! I went searching around the house, couldn't find it... Was really pissed..

Went to the guards, they took a while to do some paper work too, was dumb stuff.... By the time i was done, it's 4:45? as I walk out of the main gate, i saw 168 zoom past the bustop. I was already feeling very -_-""" @&*&@%*&!$ .....

I tried to pray abit, bus 18, came like 10mins? I was feling kinda distraught already. Once i touch down at Bedok, i rushed all the way to the station, only to miss my MRT. woah... u know? it's totally like.. .SIAN AH....

But, I realize that Chi Lam, and Daniel has been tailing me all the way, and laughing at me, till i realize they were behind me... ha, we jus chatted all the way to Somerset, was good, i didn't have to feel lonely, and the whole train ride felt really short, in fact too short.... But low and behold!!! It's 5:35 already! Rush time, run to Nexus ah!!!!

LOL, once i reach Nexus, that was when i started to solve my issues one by one, my further reporting order, though not a desired result, but the least I can now explain to my school why i'm missing my last econ's class... LOL. Den my project outline, couldn't find it, my classmates were startin to be irritated with me, but YAY!!! I found it in stacks of notes, and also, I found a revision paper for the econs exam....

I feel confident, now left 1 more hurdle to go... Hope that can be resolved too...

GRRRR

Gott sleep tomorro got work early..

Thank God for all the miracles.... I prayed and u came..

-gone

2007-11-08T03:10:00.000+08:00

I'm having some kinda migrane headache now... Is really irritating the shit out of me...

My week is still challenging as ever, and wonder as I begin to wonder if God is doing anything... I realize, it's not him....
It's ME

I think I have been rather affect by the going ons', and the "HOW AM I Feeling?" That I ignored God, I had like a kick in the head when Ben was teaching the thing about prayer... That I realize i prolly took him for granted.

Frankly, this week, I was expecting C.G to be like the regular screw ups, or worse, I might create a new record in the worst C.G ever, I was qutie ill prepared, C.G attendence wasn't really good, and worse of all, I wasn't really in the mood to be part of this gathering, I wasn't feeling so hyped in doing this C.G.

I was desperate when the C.G started, I was restless, my attitude wasn't in sync with God's and I was just like one of the distracting one, that CLs' all wanna kick out, or have a good lashing afterwards... Prolly my CL didn't know it, but i was kinda worried bout my SD, coz in the midst of all the beginning event, i was like "GOSH! Wad's point 2?!" LOL...

When worship came, I can feel the resistence, that's the little demon in me, but Thank GOD! If there was like the Angel and Demon side of me, my Angel side was having one of those "LIMIT BREAK" brink of death, whoop u to hell KO moves, and the move, i think it's called, "PRAYING DESPERATELY" God came, pick that attitude up, and place another one, before I knew it, I had so many things i wanted to speak to the guys, and i didn't have "BIG BANG" verses, all in my mind were random "my own words" I was like "Damn, I am no Nel, she can do that kinda thing, she can say like PRAY! and I will jus fall to my knees, but how many times have I tried that, but instead I get the feeling everybody's staring at this joker talkin gibberish?" and Ben still showed me the "say something signal" I was really turned off, but God rebuked me, and gave me some sense of reassurance, before I knew it, I did it again, I was really talkin quite smoothly, and I wasn't quite sure wad I was saying, I was startin to worship in spirit, was kinda hyping everybody(wasn't quite sure).. I am not sayin I am getting good at this kinda thing, but i certainly didn't feel like STEWART TAN, I was kinda like.. "STOP MAN, STOP!! WOOOOW, U're over-doing it here, PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER *slaps self* OMG!!

I really knew that it was the spirit, when i called for Him, i knew God is already here, God was aiding me, Stewart certainly can't do that now, prolly in 10 years time, but surely not now... God was there, and when I was giving teaching, I had the same problem, when i start, i was really like GOD!! Den afterwards, I started a whole bunch of gibberish, alot of it, not part of my planned script, and was really crazy..

I wanna thank God for the creators of LETTER FROM HELL, it's a fantastic presentation of how real HELL is, and the life on earth is a short and unpredictable one, and whether we die as a legacy, or jus another statistic (Quote, BEN) is all up to us...

-Thank you God for being ther when I called for U..

-AMEN

2007-11-07T02:39:00.000+08:00

Oh yea, apart from all my whining, I guess there's a little bonus

Wanna give credit to all my band members, they're faithful in helping me through this competition, though you may have another motive for doing so. LOL...

I mean, we had lotsa fun, though it's nothing fantastic, but at least we got 1 song done? Right?

So that means we already got 1 song, that no one else can write.. HAHAHAZ....

ROFL

-GONE

PS: Kenenth i am praying for you high fever to go away, U idiot, got fever dun tell me sia, must wait till your drum kiddo tell me.

2007-11-07T02:32:00.000+08:00

DAMN! I miss this blog man, and i have to think of it jus moments before i go to bed.

My eyelids are like steel plated now.

But I think i'm really ill treatin this blog, so I am gonna post something... LOL

Challenging 3 weeks for me, since coming back from Batu Pahat,

My days are really wild, and every week, I am so exhuausted..

DAMN!

Really gotta apply all the teachings i recieved recently, they seem like really good stuff, and coming at a good timing..

Dunno if I can achieve my goal for my C.G's harvest.. I'm scared, and doesn't help when people keep reminding u that fact...

Welp.... GoD, this are times I seriously need u..

Damn... do I take YOU for granted..... Come on God, dun let my fire die down, my physical body is perishing, dun let my spirtual falter too...

rofl..

OK gotta sleep got stupid lessons tomorrow

-gone

2007-10-19T02:48:00.000+08:00

*Very offensive post, advised not to read it, I'm venting anger here, so read at your own cost.

f**king mindef..

Dun u screw with me....

That stupid ministry/organization is not organized! U know i am studying, ENLIST me on 12th DECEMBER?!?!?! Dun let me do Napha, say i skipped Napha?! U didn't inform me man! And dood!! U send the letter on 11 October!!! WAD THE FUCK?!

People whom are enlisting like next year? Got their letters earlier than me who is about to be dragged in on December!!!

And COMBAT ENGINEER!? Which part of me tells u that I am a good bridge layer/builder...

COME ON, try me, put me combat engineer.. And I'll sink half your army in the ma,f**king kallang river... Come on.. try....

This is absurd man.... U guys are F***king ridiculous.... U dun do this to me man.... NO.....

-Shit u

2007-10-13T00:30:00.000+08:00

I had a sudden epiphany...

I realize that now that I am a coreteam, I have to compete against my members to work for God...

I realize that as members, we still have the responsibility to work for God...

I mean.. legit!

Members dun have the excuse, saying I am not a CL, or coreteam, so i dun have to work as hard...

HELL NO!!!!

I realize that being included in the leadership camp thingy, is my honor, and to better train me to build strong members.... It doesn't make me very exclusive from my members.

hahaz..

The season is here again...

Time to win it big...

^_^

2007-10-11T20:33:00.000+08:00

I have lots to say bout' the mission trip..

But I guess I'll talk about the happenings for Yesterday and Today

yesterday was C.G, my enthusiasm to share wad I learn was really driving me nuts... I shared a lot, and took up a lot of time, but I was a lil disappointed that my sharing didn't come out with a BIG BANG ending, but it sounded flat and stupid.

But I guess the spirit kinda affected the people around.... I felt a change in me, that I wanted to pray more, and also the guys didn't have as much arguments as I tot, they were really fellowshipping, and had a great time at 85 eating supper.... I really hope this can continue on, and blossom... Then we can compete against the UTHM BP Group!!! HIAK!!!!!!!

*It's all about glorifying your kingdom Lord!!! We are not regular Christians!*

Today can't wake up for skool... LOL... No, not can't wake up... closer to can't be bothered.... ( i know this attitude has to change)
Tot I am really screwed la, gonna be so pai seh, coz this is the 2nd time i am going for class, coz i missed 4 lesson due to the mission trip... LOL

When i arrive at the interchange on bus 168, I saw a lady fast asleep, everybody was getting down, I didn't feel right about waking her up, so I decided to ignore.... Den I reach the MRT, as i was taking a escalator, this Filipino lady who's talkin on the phone lost her balance, she was really trippin at every step, was kinda gaining speed in falling, Thank God i was 3-4 steps behind her, caught her, and push her back up.... I was kinda surprised that I didn't fall along with her... LOL... all those push-ups are really going somewhere... LOL....

Reach school, only 45 mins late... but pai seh, decided to wait till break time den go in... Tot he won't notice that way..
DEAD WRONG MAN.... he was like... HEY! THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT FOR COMING! I was like... @)&@*&$(^#%O*!@&)$&#&$ -_-" LOL...

The class got a whole bunch of old acting cute people... BUEY TA HAN... lol...

I realize i can't really keep up with the class, quite jia lat... LOL...

Gotta revise den...

But now, i wanna go work out first... see ya lata...

-gone

PS: my house got guest sia... LOL.... sian................................... LORD HELP ME!!!

2007-10-04T04:40:00.000+08:00

Rofl...

2.5 hrs to waking up, 3 hrs to leaving my house

5 hours to totally be out of country...

BATU PAHAT! Here I come!

But not sure if I forgot to bring anything, wad to expect... OMG....

LOL

Lord bless me k?

Alright...

Go Kun now

2007-10-03T17:02:00.000+08:00

Goin for mission trip tomorrow...

ROFL

2007-10-01T02:54:00.000+08:00

Life has been pretty hectic for me this days...

I think i chose it bah.... Kinda fun too, realize that I can go quite far like that.

Going mission trip soon, kinda thrilled...

Got skool tml, dunno why i now here emo-ing sia..

LOL...

Emo........................................................

Argh!!!!

I dun think havin free-time to stone for me is good... LOL....

LOL...

-Gone

2007-09-28T01:02:00.000+08:00

Dear Lord

Life is so precious, lord, let me know better to appreciate my own life, and use me more to help other people through their life.

-gone

2007-09-23T02:41:00.000+08:00

Blistered hand, thanks to the mooncake..

feeling mighty sleepy now..

Lord, bless me with stronger hands tomorrow... LOL

Super random post..

YAY... freak tired!!!!

Eyes closing... Brain dead... Mulfunction.. system crashing....

-dead

2007-09-16T18:11:00.000+08:00

Stress ah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stress stress...

Jump conference is the best... If there's a JUMP2... i urge all of u niggas to go.... Seriously

But also becoz of that... I think my expectation of myself rose.... It's not a expectation too far fetch'd for anybody to reach... Jus a lil too challenging for me..

Jia You... do welll for Wed's C.G

2007-09-16T03:35:00.000+08:00

Was a great day...

But really kinda screwed up to feel a lil messed up now...
Not moody...
I know the day is good, a lil more than jus good, GREAT! I am not sad or anything... I dun think i will bite anybody now... Jus...... U know sense of confusion? pondering???

Damn... Pop that tot out...

I need sleep...

-Gone.

2007-09-15T03:16:00.000+08:00

Recently i got addicted to 2 new songs... Both are really emotional stuff... so try to kill yourself after listening to them.... okok.. just kidding..

Jus dun read too deep into them if u're really emo.

I think i'll address them in a chronological order.. (damn dat's too formal man)

Wait.. before i start talking about them... Go kill yourself and stop reading this post if u're a simpleton, and wanna look for songs to make u look cool and complicated... These are sincere, straight to the heart stuff...

simpletons and emo's, click the X at the top right corner, and go do something fruitful..

With that!

ok...

1st

What Sarah Said - Death Cab for cutie...

DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE LYRICS
"What Sarah Said"

And it came to me then that every plan is a tiny prayer to father time
As I stared at my shoes in the ICU that reeked of piss and 409
And I rationed my breathes as I said to myself that I'd already taken too much today
As each descending peak of the LCD took you a little farther away from me
Away from me

Amongst the vending machines and year-old magazines in a place where we only say goodbye
It stung like a violent wind that our memories depend on a faulty camera in our minds
But I knew that you were a truth I would rather lose than to have never lain beside at all
And I looked around at all the eyes on the ground as the TV entertained itself

'Cause there's no comfort in the waiting room
Just nervous pacers bracing for bad newsAnd then the nurse comes round and everyone will lift their heads

But I'm thinking of what Sarah said that "Love is watching someone die"

So who's going to watch you die?..
_____

This song was introduced to me by Chi Lam, in fact the whole band was intro'ed by him... I heard of this band before, but didn't know much about it, neva heard their songs... At first.. when i heard this song.. Not very impressive... Especially when it is suppose to be a Indie Pop band... They're a lil draggy to be one... and is not really emo... But afta Chi Lam briefly explain the song to me... I was kinda taken aback, impressed by the content of the song, and the perspective they took... When i came back, and read the lyrics seriously.. Wa.... I jus keep falling in love with the song... I'm not a sadist.. But I really thought that they potray the dreadful feeling, and the whole feeling as u wait outside the ICU, and jus know in your mind that the person inside, is someone u care alot, and unless there's gonna a spark from God, he/she is as good as dead...

The way this song is performed... It really isn't like any other showoff band... The stuff doesn't sound too rock like, dreaful, or like MCR, draggy, doesn't give u the "OH MY GOD! JUS KILL ME!" Feel... I like the way Azri describes this song when first heard it.. "It's kinda the singer is telling a story, or talking..." Thought the way the song is played is kinda complicated(that is if u hear clearly, every instrument).. They dun deliberately make it sound flamboyant or too emotional.. Is neither vocal, nor instrumental driven.. They really wanna bring out the lyrics...

Second one is

SOPHIA - NERINA PALLOT

5 o' clock and a fire escape symphony,
Spilling out across the road and the square,
And the sky's the same as your own, do you think of me?
Do the parks, and trees, and the leaves, reach you, there?
After the rain, in the lonely hours he haunts me, calling out,
Again and again.

Sophia, Sophia, I'm burning, I'm burning.
It's a fire, it's a fire, I cannot put out,
Sophia, Sophia, I'm learning that some things,
I can't go without and one of of them is him.

And now I walk these streets like a stranger in my home town,
Learn the language, form the words when I speak,
But he changed me, I'm his ghost since he came around,
And now I count the hours and the days in the weeks.

Passion and silence,
Every word, every line, a measure,
It's the science of the soul,
And his books, they breathe a reason and now I want to know...

Sophia, Sophia, I'm burning, I'm burning,
It's a fire, it's a fire, I cannot put out,
Sophia, Sophia, I'm learning that some things,
I can't go without and one of of them is him.

You, with your new born eyes,
Have you ever loved a man like I love him?
Do you hurt but still feel alive, like never before?

Oh, Sophia, Sophia.
Sophia, Sophia, I'm burning, I'm burning,
It's a fire, it's a fire, I cannot put out,
Sophia, Sophia, I'm learning that some things,
I can't go without and one of of them is him.
______________

This song... Was intro'ed to me by Daniel.... I guess he was tryin to prevent me from getting too hooked up with What Sarah said, den send me this song.. LOL...

This song.. u seriously need to understand the lyrics... I did some research about this singer and song... This song was award for it's lyrics, and the reason seems rather obvious..

Is rather abstract, and also!!!! Doesn't have have a overkill feel... Though there's that longing feel, but u can feel it reach skin deep, into your heart... And not jus swirl all over your mind... Most love songs jus kinda cry about something shallow, good topic, but shallow content...

But not this....

Try to guess who Sophia is.... If u can figure it out... "BOOOOM, whole new perspective" - Daniel

I dunno the right answer to who sophia is... Coz is not stated anywhere.. so jus let your imagination run...

These are the 2 songs... they're really good... And now... once again.. I wanna warn u dudes again.. DO NOT TRY TO ACT COOL BY BLASTING THIS 2 songs, or act like u know this song and explain shit about it... And if u are emo... do not listen to them... U will prolly jus kill yourself...

So get lost simpletons and emo's... Seriously.. I'll skin u if u abuse these 2 songs

-Gone

2007-09-15T03:15:00.000+08:00

Lord bless the anniversary tomorrow..

Make it wild!!!

2007-09-15T02:17:00.000+08:00

14th Sept

Nth much happened during the afternoon, jus know it was raining, and after an exhausting Evo Retreat, sleeping for almsot 11 hours seems the best thing ever happened to me..

Evening... Wa... Dunno wad took Azri and Kana so long.... So decided to find food to eat....

God really made life interesting by making me cook 2 packs of noodles, for 3 people, and before jus before i was about to sit down and eat... Azri called...

He's there already... SIAN..

LOL... I jus chiong la, and it really wasn't smart to cook the kimchi noodle(which is bloody spicy), and try to drink down it down when it is still piping hot...
Every thing was really frantic and high speed man.... I realized i started to sweat like some kinda melting ICE.... Jus sweat man..

Reach there... Saw Azri Ben and Kana... Playing with some little kids... Look like those kinda that would shape singapore.... (into some kinda screwed up ah beng society)

Kana is super cool man.... Seriously!! Whacked!!! He's pulling all kinds of stunt... Really smooth...
He's way above wad I expected...

After they were done... We played a 6 on 7? 6 of us 7 of them. Full court match...

I was jus fooling around at first.. .Talked alot... But I go started to get really annoyed when one of those kids... one in Black... started calling me BOY!! I was like dood... "DOOD, I'm 18! If they call me that 2 years ago.. yea maybe i understand.. I'm 18! I still have to go through this? And come on... How old are u? 10?"

I tried to tell him man.. He dun seem to get it.... Maybe his 10 years on earth was spent on swearing and eating shit... He dunno wad it means by "Dude, u're annoying"

"Dun call u boy den wad? Gay?"

Dood... U wanna eat Mr. Left or Right? Or would u like to meet Mr. Turning Kick that broke roofing tiles??

As I continue to play... Though I did pull a few stunts... But I wasn't impressed with my performance... My mel side was building up... I can see obvious flaws in our plays... And I was getting annoyed at everybody... den I jus got pissed off... I guess it's better to open the boiling kettle, den close it tight and let it shoot and spray all over... So I jus remained pissed off for another half an hour or so.. LOL...

I think overall was pretty cool la... I tried getting even with him.. Punk him as much... But now thinking about it.. "Damn dawg... U're really childish!"

Who cares.. hope it doesn't piss him off too much.... my pride need some trimming bah.. LOL

Game ended, realize that Lik and Wei Xiong seems a lil screwed.. When they arrive at my place, wa can see Wei Xiong sleeping into some kinda delirious state.. hahahaz.... Hope he's ok.

Went for Sauna... Didn't realize we actually spent nearly an hour inside.... LOL...

Den went to eat... Cool.. but my stomach still not satified... The grace for the food didn't work... I prayed that the fried oyster omellette would help clear my sore throat!! GOD!!!! U PUNK'D ME!!!! hahahahaz....

Sent everybody to their way home... Den walk back with Ben... I think he's a lil zonk too... But amazingly... He still can take the time to debate with me about english... Command of english? Actually I dun really know wad's it all about...hahahaz...

K la..

End around here

-GONE-

2007-09-10T03:03:00.000+08:00

Lord.... I am amazed by your creations...

I am reminded how blessed I am by you...

The more I give, I know the more u will add upon me...

^_^

2007-09-09T04:16:00.000+08:00

I want.. freedom to express..

Dun be afraid to come talk to me bout it...

dun beat around the bush

2007-09-09T03:16:00.000+08:00

Aww damn man..

It's 3:18am.. And I really gotta blog this, or else I'll feel like knocking myself on the head..

Kao..

As usual la, jus walk back afta taking NR7 with Azri.. I gotta walk back alone, through areas that's really quiet, kinda errie... the kind, if somebody jus pops out and mug u... U also LAN LAN, kinda road...

Den gotta walk through the HDB flats.. which is not so scary liao... Den reach the Kopitiam, which is a lil more scary... but not so bad..

But walking alone... at the beginning, like when the path still feels new? U know? can't help but to get a lil goosebumpy, gay hair standing and stuff...

But afta walking so many times... Aiya, season liao la.... No kick.....

But... I was talking to God... Or rather, telling? Complaining? to him.. GOD! I WANT A SPIRIT KINDA THING! I miss that kinda thing man, people are discrening, can feel wrong spirit, chasing demons.. GOD! Why am I like a lil dry now??? Although u do sometimes like *ting*! A word for u.. But... come on... Cooler gifts? Sensing? Radar?

Ok.. so, u see tonight... I was just walking back.. 3am? Played Stolen-D/C on my MP3.... Den try to sing... was really trying to improve the way i sing it... And since it's quiet, no one's around me.. i can sing pretty loud... As I was walking through the HDB... i stop singing... Den jus listen... and mouth the words... As i walk to near the Kopitiam.. .I tot i saw something, a large humanmoid figure.. But i kinda blink, realize.. Eh... jus some fitness corner machine la... Mus be becoz i neva wear specs... so it has to be me....
Den continue walk... But within a few steps... I felt really dizzy... My sight wasn't exactly blurred, but felt a lil delirious... and my bag felt heavy.. something was pulling me back and down... I was like ?!?!?! Damn... Of all nights, it has to be this night?!

I was a kinda feeling i dun remb myself feeling...

I thought back, and remb the testimony of this adult guy in Hope that said "in Jesus name! Go away!"

I tried... Well.. it doesn't work.. Den i was like... JESUS!! WHERE ARE U!?!?!?! Den i pray.. started to pray quite a lot of nonsense as i walk..Like God, come on la, come out... Help me.. Hear me man...

Den i remb the "prayer" i mention earlier that i had with God... I was like.. "DOH!!!!!" Why did I say that?!

Prayer failed... So plan B.... Play christian song.... And of all songs i scrolled.. i had to listen to the one i like the least... Shout your fame... I was like.. DOOOD... i'm a worship kinda guy.... U give me a coperate praise?! But surprisingly... it kinda worked a lil.. My brain was less spinny... Den just continue to walk all the way back..

LOL..

Fact is.. I am not pissed or anything.. Not angry at God, not scared... But on the contrary... I'm filled with Joy and Excitment this kidna thing happened..

Means God thinks i'm cool... And let me have a lil taste...

But God.. please do not... DO NOT.... Put freakish dood looking at me now.. I am still learning how to shout your name in that kinda situation... U put it too soon before it learn it... Damn... I will go bonkers man.. bouncing off the walls..

LOL

-gone

2007-09-06T23:21:00.000+08:00

Damn.... My heart rate's JACKED man.... It jus flew up suddenly... Man... 1000beats/min!!! (ok exaggerating)

Anxiety jus seem to open it's flood gates and it's freaking drowning me!!!!! ...

I might win, or lose... I am really scared of this kinda 50/50 shit...

Damn...

WOOOOSH!!!

At least I seem to appear alright...

God.... Rest my heart...

-Gone

2007-08-28T00:30:00.000+08:00

I need some management with my pride issue...

zzz..

2007-08-26T15:35:00.000+08:00

Random post

Wa yesterday was whacked...

Emotions kinda went a little down then up up, till it went a little too high... LOL..

Was late for prayer meet again la.. I dun wanna elaborate why, becoz it will sounds like a good reason, but it doesn't stick for a frequent criminal like me... ROFL..

Got inside with Azri... felt a little blank a while, had no idea was was going on, then i realize that people were sharing their dirty little secrets...

Azri was kinda high.... dunno wad the hell is with him... LOL....

I find it pretty hard to pray la... Was so remourseful about being late... LOL.... guilty *feeling*....

I wasn't really sure if i could hit the number 2 for end September also... I really wish i can man... My GOD, is a God of miracles man.... I jus pray for myself to give 100% to this goal, dun wanna give a damn about the number, jus do my best and pray lotsa lot.

During the DMM, something, guess the Holy Spirt?(cute little guy) Told me that... DOOOD.... U need to change some of your habits man... And U need to get more spiritual food!!! I think I am trying to do that... Thank God for SUE to intro me to some cool sermon Podcast... gonna drown myself in there... Think i'm gonna needa formulate an action plan to change myself.... period...
Then they also talked about the community service thingy, to play with the kids... Man I am super hyped about the event... I dun imagine myself being a father, I dun think i have the patience to think about "MY CHILD'S FUTURE" yet. But I like to play with kids for a certain period of time... LOL...

Saw Cindy, remembered about her B'day gift? But was too focused on my race(PSP-Initial D), my butt got glued to the chair, leg cramp, hands tied to the PSP... can't move... K... LATA....

Service start... Went up... I was looking around to see if she's around so that I can pass the gift to her.. When i found her... I was already beging shoved up the stairs.. Oh well...

When i realized the guy that's gonan preach today is Michael, I gotta admit, I wasn't very very happy, or impressed... Was expecting myself to nod off... But!!!! I DIDN'T! woohooo!! He tot some pretty simple, but hard to do stuff... Letting go of our comfort zone!!! God kinda gave me a vision a picture when I was thinking through his speech.. Very often people jus often grab hold to this pillar so much, even as christians we jus grab hold to the pillar/bolster even if it has a big SIN written on it.... Becoz we're so happy with it, we dun wanna release it, reminds me of a child that love his dirty bolster so much, he is unwilling to let his parents take it for washing, even for just a day... Have u met kids like that? How much coaxing it will take before they release it... Or some of them jus neva release it till a year plus lata when they realize "Oh holy crap, it smells like doo doo"

My prayer was that God will help me out as I pry my hand off some of the evil in me, complacency, procrestination, pride... and other doo that i tried so hard to protect... (Humans are certainly the most IRONIC species of mammals on earth)

Service end... I was thinking, hmm.. should i walk over.. or jus stay here? I was like.. Den azri was like... Jus go la, I am hungry... K lo... walk over...

LOL... den afterwards is was jus High..

Went to eat with Germaine's friend... A contact that sticked around with our group.. wasn't particularly surprised that Robin gave special attention to that little dude... Didn't really like his guts la... But... overall, guess he's pretty alright.. Didn't talk to him much also..

Realize that RUSTY was missing! dun really know wad's up with him, wasn't quite impressed with that move he made la... But hope he's fine lo...

During meal time, I was jus high with Azri... Imagine yourself putting Russel Peters and Dave Chappelle together.. The only thing is... this time.. Russel peter is the skinny tall one... and Dave is the little more meaty one... LOL...

Went to carrfour, saw Germaine, then i realize, oh God damn... u look pretty shitty... Guess the words i said drove her a little nuts.. And little brave boy stepped up to protect her lo... I was like... heh? wad's up? Didn't know i made such an impact on her... Felt bad afterwards... LOL... (lesson learned)

Yada yada.. As time pass, we found a new comrade on crack... Wei Xiong... Was kinda worried that he follow us, then won't have enough time to study... But he assured me and said is ok.. I jus left as it is.. (Was i doing it right?)

We visited 3 arcades... Oh yea, forgot to mention we had a member on part-time with us, was mervyn... He followed us to visit 2 arcades, den finally left when we wanted to eat Tau Huey, den as we were walking to the 3rd arcade the selegie one... Was surprised to see Xue Ting at the bus stop... Stayed and chat with her till her bus came... Den we move on to the arcade... WX and Azri were super obsessed with House of the Dead.. but they keep dying anyway.. .LOL... I was jus eager in setting a new record on the initial D machine.. but realized the steering wheel is a little screwy... LOL... 2:51!! I WAS SO CLOSE!!! Their record was 2:48!!! 3 seconds!!! ARGH!!!

Walked to lavander jus to take NR7.... den they all crashed at my place... As was AZRI likes to say... "we are jus high on crack la" So.. ignore us.. LOL

-gone

2007-08-26T15:17:00.000+08:00

About time i start to update my links and stuff.... LOL...

I gotta admit, I've been really neglecting my blog... Links not up la and I'm startin to get bored of the skin man... LOL.....

Welp.... Let's see wad a IT-idiot like me can do... Hope i dun screw up that page, then the next thing u guys will see is a blank page on www.free-expression.co.nr ... LOL...

2007-08-21T02:08:00.000+08:00

I'm not very happy with the fact that my manager didn't put me down to work on Monday and Tuesday, and also I AM SO SO SO not happy that i haven't got my pay, while others have already gotten their pay, and prolly finished spending it.

But.... Today is a pretty good day...

Nothing much happened during the day time, jus noe i slept till like 12plus? almost 1pm? Becoz my body was too exhausted over the run... But thank God, didn't wake up with aches or anything, jus woke up with a cold, and a ulcer...(That's still not good...) LOL...

Den lepak lepak, read abit of Harry Potter... Den leave for BLM excursion... At first i was quite reluctant to go, since Wei Siang was late, and I find it hard to go to a place where i dunno anybody.... So i slack abit at home, but afta that mustered my (courage? Balls?) erm.. and jus leave my house... Den i realize Xiao Ying was also there... YAY!!!

Was a lil worried i'll be too late, so rush a cab down from Bedok.... Pretty EX... SOb.... SOb....

But I told myself, sicne i paid 12 bucks for the cab, I might as well get my 12bucks worth of knowledge.....

When i arrive there, haven't started... After snacking abit, when the thing actually started.... Nothing big or anything, jus a simple tour around a skin care business... Den the boss made a little speech...At the beginning, i couldn't really catch much... But subsequently I realize I was learning alot, her partner/employee took over to talk about the slightly more complicated marketing stuff... Dat was i started to feel a little like... BRAIN WAVE OVERLOAD!!!

There were like so many traditional methods and ideas, and some new ones that I heard before, but always tot it was useless, den I realize how those olden principles are becoming more popular in the new world....

Hahahz... Really did learn alot, Thank God I recorded some of those things i learned on my HP... Now to gather my thoughts!

-Gone

2007-08-18T02:42:00.000+08:00

Wanna dedicate sometime to blogging...

Can't say I had the coolest day today... But I think i learned a lesson or 2...

Went to work as waiter with Ear-Shot for a fine-dining lunch banquet... Realized that actually, fine-dining is a race against time eating... Dun spend too much time talking during fine-dining, the waiter will jus take your plates away...

After getting screwed a few times becoz of my noobienest, I wasn't feeling all good la... But got a hang... Still, didn't really find the job fun, becoz my back hurts after squatting and standing and squatting and standing, and it doesn't feel good to actually serve people that actually ignores and dun appreciate u... LOL...
Den My pay check... COMPLICATED ISSUE!!! Need to photocopy my passbook, etc etc. Photocopy IC... wa lao eh... Angry.... Work so hard, come early do sai kang, now still need to do complicated stuff to just get paid $35... Diao..

After a super miserable ride back to Esplanade, tot like "YAY, finally, come back to the Cafe, that's the place where i can perform.."

Upon arrival, I saw a rather deadly combination Eddie and Felix... But i tot, ya, they should be pretty alright with me la... So no worries.. So came in, Felix ask about my work, I whine to him abit... Den I told him how hungry i was.... Tot HE WAS NICE TO MAKE WAFFLES FOR ME! no is for customer.. Sian... NVM lo... i make myself.

In the midst of making the waffle, custoemr order drink, Eddie called me, so i was like.. Diao.. can't u see i am making lunch? I dun wanna overcook my waffle... But i like.. aiya senior mah, respect... Walk over lo... "Do white choc" I wasn't sure how it was done... Eddie went off with his sarcastic shit again, den compare me with other people... Den yabba somemore... His sarcasm are the nagging ones... I dunno how he do it... But i tell u... It drove me nuts..

I was hungry, and tired, but enthusiatic about work.. U need to understand I will snap.... Especially when u start to go out of point... And start to get sarcastic....
I argued back... Den we jus went on... Till dunno when.. The manager went out, and came back.... I had no idea wad the hell is his problem.... I dun think he remembers wad he was saying, and he claims he's not angry, not argueing... But he can't even remb how the whole thing started, jus bite on the fact he's right... Terrific idea to take a 10 mins break, make me eat my cold waffles and come back for 2nd round... I mean like come on, u're scaring away the custoemrs!

K lo... U win lo... Somemore still go and announce to everybody what I did, then argue back at me so loud, scare customer... Knowing that this is dead lock... I jus kept quiet lo.... Somemore still come and action use vulgarity at me sia.... Sir u only noe the 4 letter that dipicts sex in a violent manner.. I can say sex violently in 4 different languages man... And I have a 5 second record of vulgar rap... dood... U really dunno wad u dealing with la...

But.. I guess we both are in the wrong la... Becoz if either one was right... we should be capable of shutting the other guy up rather quickly... We'll jus continue to roll till somebody decides to stop... it's Amazing to see wad a 18 yr old, and a 23yr old can do. Guess we weren't very matured afterall..

I gave thought about the whole arguement afterwards as I was waiting for Ben and his friend to come to city... I felt rather miserable.. I thought at first that I was most affected by his insults and sarcasam, but i realized afterwards thanks to Ben's help that i was most concerned with his "announcing to everybody about my mistakes" act.... I think that is wad drove me nuts... Den i was like "DUDE! Why are u still so insercure man? Why u care so much about wad others thing?

Have to thank God for my shepherd, and long time friend.. Ben... He reminded me of this quote by John C Maxwell "If you take care of you character, your reputation will take care of itself"

I am so glad that this came to me... It's gonan be pretty tough to overcome the insercure factor, but i'm sure if perfect myself in the cafe, and keep myself right... I should be alright..

So come on God! Watch over me... It wasn't such a pleasant experience, but i guess i learned alot, oh it to u dear Omega Dad.

Oh my bio dad is back.. LOL

Go say Hi to him den sleep liao

-Gone-

PS: This work experience really proves Pastor Jeff's point when he says "Your boss will not pray or write you encouragement cards...." hahahaz...

Also, MY IQ is not low ok! LOL.... I was jus kidding about it... ^_^

2007-08-14T03:48:00.000+08:00

My covenant, with God...

I mus change..

2007-08-14T03:07:00.000+08:00

Efforts are not meant to be seen, they're meant to be bricks to build a better character.

A brick doesn't worth much to society, but a skyscrapepr is always an awe to it.

If i dun show it, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt...

I am not use to it, and people may not know..

I unconciously lie about it, but after that when i think about it... I am really desiring wad I am denying..

I need to destress... Just becoz my life seems carefree, doesn't mean I lead an easy life..

But I dun deserve any of those... I need to keep pushing through... I dun need other's praise nor sympathy... I can handle myself easily and well..

-Gone.

2007-08-09T06:59:00.000+08:00

Woohoooo..

Going for man's conference soon....

It's starting to rain la... WTF..

I pray that my school module switch will work out.... Please pelase work out...

I dun feel exactly too sleepy... in fact pretty energy

Lord... take away all the axiety...

Ok... Perhaps dun take away the axiety... I might fall asleep without it.. LOL

K la... go bathe den go out liao

2007-08-08T23:57:00.000+08:00

People who know Jeremy(NS)... Let us pray for his family that he can tide through a tight financial situation.. They are having some trouble now, let us pray for him and his family that God may be with them through every moment and circumstance, and they can tide through this problem without much bumps...

-many thanks